When you sense something fishy in your relationship, chances are, you’re almost always right. Although it’s also fairly easy to misconstrue odd behavior as cheating, that gut feeling is spot on more often than not. Once you spell your worst fears out loud, you’ll realize most of them make sense in your head. With this list of 10 signs your wife just slept with someone else that we’ve drawn up, things should get easier to spot.
When you’re trying to deal with the ‘my wife is a cheater’ feeling, your paranoia and desperation might make you take drastic steps. But you don’t want to ruin your relationship with a baseless accusation either, right? Especially if you’re married. Until you gather concrete evidence to verify all the physical signs your wife just slept with someone else, you have to hold on to your patience.
Don’t worry, we are not asking you to wait forever. As you know, the best way to figure out if you’re being cheated on is by confronting your partner. But if you want to catch the signs your wife just slept with someone else before you have that confrontational conversation, we’re here to help you out. So, is your wife having sex with another man? Let’s find out…
10 Signs Your Wife Just Slept With Someone Else
Table of Contents
Let’s be clear about one thing from the get-go: you can never be 100% sure about your wife’s infidelity just by anticipating and assuming. There are a few characteristics of a cheating woman you can catch if you look for them in the right places. And no, your wife mentioning some other guy’s name once while dreaming does not qualify as a sign of her infidelity. There’s a fine line between catching physical signs your wife is cheating and just being a paranoid mess and accusing her of something she’s not guilty of.
You are saying, “I think my wife is cheating on me.” Fair enough. She must have given you some reasons to feel this way. But if your insecurities are stemming solely from unjust jealousy, neither we nor anyone else can help you. Hence, knowing exactly what to look for is important.
If your wife has slept with another man, she has already emotionally checked out of your relationship. It is possible that a married woman cheating on her partner with multiple partners may be supplementing her primary relationship, not ending it. However, that still means that the emotional connection is yet to wane off, leading to a myriad of signs you can be on the lookout for. So, if you have been googling things like “Cheating wife having sex with another man. What to do?”, buckle in. Read the following signs with an open, unbiased mind.
1. Her phone is suddenly the most protected jewel in the world
In most relationships, your partner’s phone is always off-limits unless you’ve both discussed otherwise. However, if in the past, you’d been able to use your SO’s phone to place an order or to google something. But now, it feels like she protects her mobile phone more than ever, and it’s a cause for concern.
This Reddit user, suspicious of her wife’s infidelity, says, “The protectiveness of the phone quickly ramped up to the point where it doesn’t leave her person anymore, if it needs charging she moves the charger to the socket where she is sitting to charge.”
If a woman is lying about sleeping with someone, her mobile phone will hold all the secrets. So she’ll act like it’s an explosive device that will self-destruct the minute your hands get on it. Wherever she goes, the phone goes along — be it in the kitchen or the bathroom! If her passcode has gone from a 4-digit pin to what now seems like nuclear launch codes, you know something could be up. If you’re looking to answer “How can you tell if your wife has slept with someone else?”, try to notice the importance her phone holds in her life. Has her phone suddenly gone from being a paperweight to a top-secret piece of technology that must be protected at all costs?
Related Reading: What To Do When Someone Lies In A Relationship
2. White lies about things you know aren’t true
The characteristics of a cheating woman can often include her lying to you about simple things such as where she was throughout the day, or other white lies, while maintaining eye contact. Maintaining sanity if your partner is a compulsive liar will put you to the test, as you’ll soon find out.
While talking about figuring out if you have an unfaithful wife, my friend David once said, “I was frustrated with my unfaithful wife blatantly lying to my face every single day. The worst part was she would get defensive the moment she felt cornered. I had to finally confront her about my worst fear for the sake of my mental peace.”
When you’re figuring out how to tell if your cheating wife is lying to you, try to notice the physical signs your wife is cheating. White lies, coupled with tell-tale signs, definitely warrant your attention. Watch out for these signs:
- She changes the subject very often
- She lies on her social media about her relationship status
- She ‘mistakenly’ called you by a different name (maybe of her affair partner?)
- She gets highly defensive about trivial matters, such as sharing her bank statements
- She takes off her wedding ring before leaving the house, or puts it on before coming home
- She goes into extreme details about something you know is a lie
- She tries to completely dismiss an important topic
3. Her body language around you changes
While we are on the subject of physical signs your wife is cheating, there’s nothing better than noticing tangible things that say “My wife is a cheater.” Unfortunately, for cheaters, controlling their body language while lying is extremely hard. So a few slip-ups despite her attempts to pull herself together can show you signs of cheating guilt. Unfaithful wives will:
- Avoid eye contact when talking
- Cross arms (to establish a barrier between you two) during a serious conversation
- Flush when confronted
- Exhibit signs of anxiety. For instance, nervous sweats can be a sign she cheated and feels guilty
Out of the 10 signs your wife just slept with someone else, this is a sign she will have the most trouble hiding. If your wife slept with another man, she has already taken a step toward the impending doom of the relationship.
4. Unhealthy coping mechanisms
Another sign a wife cheats on husband regularly is that you’ll see a sudden shift in her habits. Cheating guilt takes a toll on anybody, and you eventually need to find a way to cope with it. Most people choose unhealthy ways. You can easily answer the question “How can you tell if your wife has slept with someone else?” by pointing out any unhealthy coping mechanism she might have adopted.
If your wife has cheated in the past, it would be rather easy for you to spot the same toxic coping mechanisms. They could include things such as:
- Drinking
- Smoking
- Binge-eating
- Compulsive shopping
- Gambling
- A sudden compulsive dependency on anything unhealthy
Related Reading: When Married To An Emotionally Distant Spouse
5. She may appear distant
If you closely look for signs your wife is sleeping with someone else, you will realize that she has become distant. Be it through physical signs or from just the way she talks to you, she might seem as though she’s not as comfortable being with you in the same room. Guilt often does that to a person.
Being emotionally distant is a common relationship red flag you should watch out for. If a woman is lying about sleeping with someone and has outgrown the relationship, she might show the following tell-tale signs:
- She may appear to be spaced out while talking to you or just not mentally present at all
- She may start avoiding family gatherings with you
- If you are used to giving each other real-time updates, silence on that front can be odd
- Your social life together may have taken a hit
- She may not want to be seen publicly with you. For instance, you don’t go grocery shopping together anymore
- She may start hanging out with their single friends more
6. The bedroom is strictly for sleeping in
From the 10 signs your wife just slept with someone else, this one will probably sting the most. Her libido may suddenly die down, leaving you wondering if you did something wrong. In fact, as physical contact between you two starts to wane, the bedroom becomes the best place to notice all sorts of signs that tell you “my wife is a cheater.” But, let us just remind you, there can be various other reasons for a sexless relationship. For instance, she:
- May genuinely not be in the mood for sex
- May have a low sex drive at the moment due to her workload
- May be going through a hormonal flux
If once in a blue moon, you do get ‘lucky’, she might just ask you to do something different in bed. She might want something new because she likes doing it with her lover. But she could also be harmlessly experimenting because she wanted to try something new she picked up while watching porn or her girlfriends recommended it. So, this is a bit tricky!
But if a lack of interest in sex happens in tandem with some of the other warning signs of cheating, then the presence of another person in her life cannot be ruled out.
7. She’s out of touch for hours on end
If it seems like your partner has suddenly become the unofficial CEO of her company and is always knee-deep in work, something may well be askew here. The excuses get more generic. “Work”, “There’s no signal”, or “Battery low” can only be heard so many times before you start losing patience. You might also notice that spending time together has become a thing of the past.
A Reddit user shares his experience of his cheating wife having an extramarital affair: “I think my wife is cheating on me. I’ve been thinking about it and she has been acting weird. She’s been working long hours, she’s been on 2 girls’ trips this month, and she’s been randomly called in to work on her days off. I don’t know what to do?”
Of all the 10 signs your wife just slept with someone else, this one might be the most easily misconstrued, especially if her generic excuses hold weight. We know it’s hard, but try to walk a mile in your partner’s shoes before jumping to a conclusion. Make sure that in your quest to find answers to your google queries such as “Is my cheating wife having sex with the other man? What are my options?”, you don’t fall prey to your insecurities in a relationship.
Related Reading: How To Catch A Cheating Partner – 9 Tricks To Help You
8. The cuddles feel cold
When a wife cheats on husband, and when a person is frozen solid with guilt, something as incredibly wholesome as cuddles can feel cold. It can be extremely difficult to embrace the one person you love the most only to realize that the warmth between the two people has vanished into thin air.
Physical or emotional intimacy of any kind will take a hit if she’s lying about sleeping with someone else. The hugs won’t feel as good, and the kisses won’t be as passionate. Look at it this way: The guilt of cheating on you is likely manifesting as coldness in your relationship.
9. No promises for the future
While you were planning trips to the mountains or beaches just a couple of months ago, it now seems like your wife doesn’t engage in future planning with you anymore. Well, that could simply be because she doesn’t see a future with you.
If your wife is hesitant to talk about any future plans with you or says things like, “You never know what’s going to happen”, that’s a married woman cheating on her husband — a woman who cannot envision a future with you anymore. If you two can’t discuss your future like you used to, that’s a clear sign something is off! After all, if your wife slept with another person, she has already decided to shut the door on a ‘happily ever after’ with you.
Sometimes, trying to answer questions like “Is my wife having sex with another man?” requires a more substantial analysis of the things your cheating wife says or does, and not an effort to find circumstantial evidence. In other words, you don’t need the phone passcode of an unfaithful wife to try and figure out what’s happening.
10. Your partner is never home anymore
A married woman cheating on her partner may have started going out simply because staying at home now suffocates her. Her constant absence for long periods of time, coupled with distant behavior, may leave you feeling lonely in your relationship. Have the following scenarios become more and more frequent:
- She always has an excuse to stay away from home
- She is frequently late from work or has after-work plans
- The frequency of her over-night trips has doubled
- She has started visiting her folks a lot
In a way, these signs a wife cheats on husband would push you toward the final confrontation that you were deliberately putting off. We understand it’s not going to be a cakewalk but, at least, it won’t be as difficult now that you know what to expect from her and from this relationship.
How To Deal With Your Wife Having Sex With Another Man
As we said earlier, there is no way to know the truth behind your cheating wife with accuracy. You will have to either confront your partner about your suspicions (something we recommend) or gather irrefutable evidence. Finding out if she’s cheating on you online might be one of them. Additionally, paying close attention to the following is crucial:
- Don’t go about stalking your partner trying to gather ‘evidence’
- The first step is to stay calm. Take a deep breath and ask her about it
- You may keep an eye out for the signs your wife is sleeping with someone else and catch her in the act
- Even if your partner admits to having cheated, we recommend that you don’t act on impulse
- Your next move should be to take some time off to process the feelings of hurt and betrayal. Being cheated on changes you. When your trust is shattered, staying together can seem nearly impossible
- Taking care of your own needs should be a priority. What do you want?
- If she regrets cheating and a part of you truly doesn’t want to let go of the relationship, maybe you can consider reconciling. In that case, talk to a marriage counselor
- If her infidelity feels like the last nail in the coffin, you will have to walk out. Another good reason to seek professional help
- Consult a therapist to be able to process the emotional trauma of betrayal. Bonobology’s counseling services can help guide you toward a better state of mind
- Stay connected with your loved ones for support
Key Pointers
- When a wife cheats on husband, there will be tell-tale signs of her infidelity. Paying attention to a change in the pattern of your marital life can help you identify if something has changed
- If your wife is having sex with another man, she will become extremely protective of her privacy all of a sudden. Unfaithful wives also wish to disconnect from their old lives as much as possible, so they might grow distant from you and your loved ones
- Look for physical signs your wife just slept with someone else, such as her body language or suspicious transactions in her bank statements
- Speak to your partner, in the company of a marriage counselor, to resolve the issue of marital infidelity
We hope that the signs mentioned in this article will help you find out if something is gravely wrong in your relationship, or if it’s missing a spark. If you think you are currently experiencing infidelity in your dynamic with your girlfriend, or if your wife is cheating on you, don’t hesitate to consult a therapist. Professional counselors can perhaps guide you to a more harmonious marriage. Through the guidance of experts and with the support of your loved ones, you can make better sense of the signs of infidelity around you and fix whatever may be wrong in your relationship.
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