Money is desired by all, worshipped by almost all, and misunderstood by many. Money is neither the root of all evil nor is it the only possible way to achieve goodness and happiness in life. It is what you think about money, more specifically your relationship with money, that decides how you are going to behave when you have it and when you don’t.
When money plays such an important role in almost everything we do in our lives, it is hard to imagine that it would not have a profound effect on the intimate relationships we have with people around us. This is especially true for our relationships with romantic long-term partners and/or spouses. Setting proper money relationship goals can go a long way in ensuring not just the financial but the emotional health of your relationship.
Achieving Money Relationship Goals
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Money and relationships directly affect each other so setting money relationship goals is important. Depending upon the unique dynamics that you have with your partner, you can choose to be fairly open about your finances or not. Both are valid choices. If you are not open about every single detail of your financial situation, it doesn’t always mean that you do not trust your partner.
It could also mean that your unique understanding of money and your circumstances make you wary of sharing your bank details with anyone, including your parents. However, never lead your partner to believe that you are better or worse off than you actually are while planning mutual finances before marriage.
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Also, remember to not go beyond your budget to impress your partner. I would say keep a balance between buying things and creating joint property and investing in having joint experiences through holidays. All of this requires as meticulous a planning strategy as any other important thing in life.
Remember, everything you plan together as a couple requires money and mindfulness in order to create new, happy memories. All three M(s) in this equation are important when it comes to money and relationships. So, set your money relationship goals accordingly.
Here are 5 tips to achieve financial harmony in the real world as a couple:
1. Financial education
Just the way we need to learn to bring up a baby, we need to learn everything that doesn’t just come naturally to us. Educating yourself about the market and your place in it will help you understand your options as a couple and as individuals. While budgeting for couples, meeting agents from trusted banks may be a good idea, in addition to the research you have to do on your own.
Related Reading: When the man is the only breadwinner and the wife refuses to pitch in
2. Budgeting for fun
It is important to do fun things together, and a lot of those fun things, in addition to the household expenses, require money. Financial planning and working on money relationship goals for couples are especially important in such situations so that one can have an expectation of approximately how much to spend and avoid going overboard.
3. Division of expenses
It is of value to divide household and other expenses between the two of you. It helps not just to streamline the whole process. It also takes away the unnecessary pressure that ambiguity brings with it.
4. Surprise your partner but not your account
Occasional surprise gifts and visits aside, consult each other before buying stuff for each other. A lot of the time we end up buying things that may be of no use to our partner and only add to the clutter in the house. It would start feeling a total waste of money after the initial euphoria of giving and receiving a surprise gift fades.
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5. Gifts for friends and family
Financially planning birthdays, anniversaries and weddings can be very beneficial for you and your financial health with your partner. Do not try to go overboard with buying gifts for birthdays and anniversaries. The thoughtfulness of a gift is not always correlated to its grandness.
It can be frustrating keeping tabs on every buck at first. But, once you get into a habit of balancing both money and relationships, it will start seeming much easier. You will soon know it is worth doing it for yourself and for the financial harmony of your relationship.
FAQs
Budgeting for couples involves consideration of individual earnings and savings and a calculation of expenses. You need to take into account household expenses and those incurred during vacations and hosting parties. Once you have an idea about the expenses, you can divide and conquer them accordingly.
Married couples should employ a ‘do what works for you’ method. There could be one main breadwinner while the other takes care of the household or the finances could be split 50-50. If someone earns and contributes more financially, their partner could balance it out by contributing in other ways.
Financial planning for couples comes in handy when trying to avoid money problems in a relationship. Discuss your financial goals and how both of you plan on contributing, financially or otherwise, upfront. Like with most other things in a relationship, the answer to solving money problems is open, honest communication. Remember, if you are struggling but won’t tell your partner, they won’t be able to support you.
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