I am in love with a boy who is already committed to a relationship for the past 4 years. He says he is in love with both of us. My boyfriend is two-timing me, although he says that very truthfully.Â
My Boyfriend Is Two Timing Me
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He was actually cheating on his steady girlfriend with other girls too. But now he said he has changed after meeting me. But he feels since that girl is not at fault he can’t leave her.
He hides every single detail about his life from her but tells me everything. I guess that’s why he is two-timing me and cheating her. I find this whole situation very complicated at times. But I am madly in love with him.Â
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Our two-timing relationship
Now we are in a relationship for the last 6 months. He actually talks with both of us but he said that he will marry me.
The signs that he is two timing me are very much there but when he says he can’t leave me I tend to believe him. Despite knowing that he is in relationship, I fell for him.
I think that’s my fault. I love him with all my heart and I can’t leave him. But sometimes I feel this could be an unhealthy relationship that we are having. And he could be also lying to me.
How I am dealing with the situation
Every single day there is regret in my heart that I am doing wrong to her. Every single night I just lose myself. This guilt makes me hollow from the inside. I only know how I am dealing with a boyfriend who is two timing me. I know everything but I feel helpless.
Please help me out.
Hello Dear,
A leopard can never change his spots. Well, in this day and age they can opt for skin grafting, but the desire to change has to come from inside. They also need to have the means. So the question here is –
a. Does he really want to change?
b. Does he have the means to change?
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Can you really trust him?
He still continues to have relationships with two women (perhaps more, you will never know and honestly, you will never be able to trust him) keeping one in the dark, and making the other (you) accept his cheating nature.
He is also cheating on you. You know, if you wear two pairs of jeans you will look odd. Similarly, there is something terribly odd with this boy. He will probably never marry you and he will probably never marry the other girl either.
Can you continue a relationship knowing this?
Every relationship doesn’t have to end up in marriage. And even if he does marry you he enjoys attention from many people at the same time – so trust me, being stuck to one woman is not in his nature. Women are like trophies to him.
Love makes you do strange things
I admit and there is nothing wrong in being in a strange love if that is what you desire. If you can accept that apart from you he will have someone or the other, then remain with him.
If you can’t, then don’t. For knowingly you went ahead with this relationship and after being in this, you want to change him.
This is wrong on your part – to want a change in the one you love. If you can accept him and always forgive him for his ways then stay on.
Love him with his faults
Love him like this, as a faulty guy if you have to love. And if you can accept this, then you will not hate yourself for loving him. This is what is beautiful about love – it makes you love yourself as well. Stay loved. Always!
Love,
Joie Bose
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