In the relationship game of thrones, there is nothing worse than being dumped. When you’re writhing in pain and nursing the emotional wounds, it’s only natural to find yourself wondering how to make your ex regret leaving you. And who can blame you for these feelings? When you’re consumed by heartbreak and pain, imagining your ex consumed with regret over losing you might help offer some relief. 

This may not be a lofty goal to set for yourself, given that breakup regret is common. In a survey conducted by a dating website, out of the 1,400 participants, 76.5% admitted to regretting dumping their partner within 60 days post-breakup, and 73% admitted they would go back to their ex if given a chance. So, yes, your ex could be made to regret breaking up with you. 

However, you need to tread carefully, making sure you don’t sacrifice your dignity, let yourself get hurt again, and do something that drives your ex further away from you. To that end, we bring you 11 psychological tricks that can make your ex view you in a completely different light and re-think their decision to part ways.   

How To Make Your Ex Regret Leaving You—11 Psychological Tricks 

Before you set out to employ any psychological tricks to make your ex regret letting you go, be very clear about your objective: is this a ‘win ex back’ plan, or just a way to make your ex regret losing you? Are you sure you are willing to accept them if they come back? Or do you just want a kick out of watching them feel like a fool for letting a person like you go? Recognizing the intensity of your own emotions and the lengths to which you are willing to go is important. 

Remember that you can make your ex regret hurting you and want you back only when you are in an empowered state. So make yourself the focus even if your target is your former partner, and employ these fail-proof psychological tricks to get your ex to regret leaving you:

1. Work through your emotional pain

The first step is to ensure that you are emotionally stable because when you’re overwhelmed by emotions, you may act in ways that you may come to regret later. And that’s not what you’ve set out to do. Your goal is to see your ex regretting the breakup, and to achieve that you need to be in the right head space, emotionally. To do that, you need to:

• Give yourself enough time to mourn the relationship you’ve lost and work through the pain and hurt 
• Seek therapy and the help of friends and close family members if needed
• Make sure that you are over the worst phase of the breakup and can think with clarity  

2. Get out of sight for a while 

It may seem counterintuitive when you’re trying to figure out how to make your ex regret leaving you, but your best course of action is to maintain a low profile as you work through the initial aftermath of being dumped and go through the stages of grief after a breakup. Don’t fall off their radar completely (read the remaining points to know why) but create a mystery around you while you grieve over them. 

For instance, if you want to make your ex-girlfriend regret leaving you or your ex-boyfriend repent his actions, making yourself invisible for a bit can stir up their curiosity about what you’re up to. Do this while you are working on yourself and getting a transformation that, when revealed, will blow their mind and make your ex regret losing you. It may even prompt an effort to patch up.  

Related Reading: How To Break Up With Someone Long Distance

3. Hit social media with a vengeance 

Once you’ve gathered the pieces of your broken heart, it’s time to dust off yourself and emerge as a phoenix rising from the ashes. Now, you may wonder, how to make your ex miss you and regret letting you go by seeing this new, improved version of you when you’re no longer in each other’s lives. Well, that’s what social media is for. It’s time to up your game because social media is all about perception and you need to win this perception war. Essentially, use Instagram, Snapchat, or Facebook to document the great life you’ve been leading since the breakup.

• Post pictures of yourself with your friends having a grand time
• Pose in your new outfits and write engaging and happy captions without referencing your breakup
• Pique their curiosity by giving just enough details about your activities. Make them want more information

4. Do not initiate contact with your ex but leave the window open for them 

How to make my ex regret leaving me, you ask? Well, one sure-shot way of doing that is by letting them feel your absence. Give them a chance to miss you and see what life without you looks like. If you established the no-contact rule after the breakup, do not be the one to end it by initiating contact. However, leave the window open for them to reach out to you. 

How? By not blocking or unfollowing them on personal messengers and social media. Continue to be MIA but remain somewhere on their radar. Make your presence felt through common friends and people in your network and go about your life as if nothing has gone wrong, while holding back on initiating a conversation or an in-person meeting. 

5. Focus on becoming the best version of yourself

To make him regret losing you or make her re-think her decision to dump you, you need to focus on becoming the best version of yourself while making sure that your ex gets to see the glimpses of the progress you’re making. 

For instance, you can work toward getting a ‘revenge body’ by hitting the gym with a vengeance and becoming fitter and hotter than ever before. Or give yourself a makeover that you’ve always secretly wanted but were not sure you could pull off. Surprise your ex with your smarter and sassier physical appearance so that they know what they’re missing out on. 

• Get a new wardrobe, invest in a good salon, wear brighter colors
• How to get revenge on your ex? Work toward being in your best shape—it also boosts your self-confidence 
• Give yourself a goal on how you want to look. Perhaps your ex liked short hair, so now is your chance to chop your locks and get some bangs—only if you like them too, of course 

Related Reading: 19 Dos And Don’ts After A Breakup

6. Be dignified about the breakup

If you’re wondering how to make your ex want you back, here is a valuable lesson for you: resist the temptation to badmouth or speak ill of your ex even if they have walked all over your vulnerable heart. Instead of constantly worrying about how to make your ex regret leaving you, plan to hit back in a way that gets the world on your side.

Be dignified about the breakup, sticking to politically correct responses like, “There are no hard feelings”, “I wish them the best”, “What we shared was special, and for that, I will always be grateful”. Even if your ex left you for someone else, don’t attack their intentions or their new relationship. It will make you come across as a high-value woman or man—someone your peers will respect. When your ex hears about it from common friends, they won’t be able to help but feel a tinge of regret for letting go of someone so mature and sensible.  

7. Keep calm when you see them

In your quest to figure out how to make a man regret losing you or how to make a woman rethink leaving you, perception is reality. The way you react when you meet your ex for the first time after the breakup can go a long way in determining how they feel about you. So you have to maintain the façade of being unaffected by your ex even if the pain of being dumped is killing you on the inside. 

• Keep calm if you bump into each other at a public place or social gathering 
• Don’t appear agitated or too happy when you see them. Instead, give them the cold shoulder
• Let them know you are over them (but not in as many words) and keep your head held high

8. Hint that there is someone else in your life 

We are not suggesting you jump into the dating ring on the rebound, but a bit of casual dating with a lot of self-awareness isn’t a bad idea when you want to make him/her regret losing you. Perhaps, you can consider going out on a date with someone who has had an eye on you for a while or someone you connected with on a dating app. Post a picture on social media in a way you are sure your ex will see it. Reality will hit them hard on seeing someone else enjoy your company, and there is every chance they might question the decision to end things with you. 

Related Reading: Expert Lists 10 Signs Of Intimacy In A Relationship

9. Focus on career success 

How to make your ex want you back, you wonder? Well, becoming someone way out of their league can certainly stir up a desire for reconciliation in your ex’s heart. One way to achieve that is by focusing all your energy on becoming successful professionally. Often, love can take over your life and your ambitions about career and financial goals might go off-track. 

If you have compromised your professional life for your relationship, now is the time to focus single-mindedly on your career growth. Professional success adds oodles of confidence, which is always a great quality that attracts new love into your life and makes an old flame rethink the breakup. 

10. Lead a happy single life 

As we said before, in your “how to make my ex regret leaving me” quest, you have to focus on yourself. So, instead of longing for the good time you had with your former partner, use this time to live your life as a single person to the fullest. Of course, make a splash about it, so that your ex can see you in a new light and revisit their decision to break up with you. Go ahead, do all those things alone that you missed doing while you were in a relationship: 

• Travel alone
• Meet new people
• Join a fun class
• Expand your social circle

11. Maintain a good relationship with their friends and family 

This is a toughie but one of the most vital tips on how to make your ex regret leaving you. To make your ex realize your worth, you need a go-between, a bridge of sorts, that keeps your lives tangentially linked and ensures that your former flame gets regular updates about your happy, fulfilling post-breakup life. However, often, when a couple breaks up, their circle of friends gets split down the middle as well, and it’s not unusual for families to distance themselves from exes, so you may have to be tactful and smart about this. Here are some things you can try: 

• Make sure you stay tight with any mutual friends you have, taking the initiative to make plans to hang out. When you do, don’t bring up your ex or rant about the breakup but make it a point to let them know that you’re perfectly okay with them being friends with your ex as well 
• Wish their mom or sister or whoever you were closest to in the family on their birthday and on holidays. If they respond, gradually take things forward by offering to help them something or suggesting that you get coffee sometime 
• If you’ve friended any of their colleagues or acquaintances on social media, don’t unfollow/unfriend them. Instead, make it a point to engage with their posts, so that they feel compelled to reciprocate, and of course, may end up telling your ex about them

How Do You Know If Your Ex Regrets Leaving You?

In 2015, a large study of adults of all ages, including gay men and women, involved 5,705 participants in 96 countries. There was a marked difference among genders in terms of the healing process and long-term impact. Women, though affected more in the short term, tended to reflect and move on eventually. On the other hand, breakups hit men later and they tend to remain much more regretful and often mention a past partner as the best they ever had.

Breakup regret is clearly common. But while you may work hard on getting your love back into your life or at least making sure that they regret leaving you for someone else, there is something you should never do—go after them if they are not interested. If, after all of the above efforts, your ex gives no indication that she or he regrets losing you, it is time to well and truly move on. However, if you play your cards right, there is a good chance that you may win your ex back. But how do you tell if things are progressing in the right direction? Here are 5 signs of breakup regret to watch out for: 

Related Reading: The Right Way To Use Power Of Silence After A Breakup

1. They engage with you on social media 

If your ex still has positive feelings toward you, then they will not unfriend or unfollow you. If your ex has even a remote interest in getting back together with you, then they would try to convey the message, subtly, through their social media activity. Liking or commenting or sharing your post is their way of saying “no hard feelings”, and it is one of the foremost signs she regrets losing you or he is rethinking the breakup. 

2. They will attempt to stay in touch 

You will be on their radar or they will ensure they are on yours. Be it casually bumping into you while you are happily hanging out with your pals or sending you inspirational words of encouragement messages or festival greetings (ostensibly as forwards), they will not completely cut off ties with you. It may not be because they regret breaking up with you and want you back but it could be the first step toward reconciliation. 

3. They will enquire about you 

If not directly, at least indirectly, they will want to know what’s happening in your life. More so, if you have followed the above-mentioned steps and piqued their curiosity about your sassier, more confident and successful self. If they have been making inquiries discreetly through common friends, it’s a clear sign of breakup regret. Your ex may be open to giving it another shot. 

Related Reading: How Guys Text When They Like You – We Give You 15 Clues

4. They share memories with you

If you still talk to your ex, they may talk about the past or randomly share a Facebook memory of the two of you from two years ago. It’s definitely a huge sign that your ex regrets letting you go and is pining over you. 

5. They feel jealous if you start dating again

Let’s say you have been dating again after your breakup and make no bones about your new partner. If your ex has some feelings for you, they will seethe in jealousy. A study conducted on 509 women and 338 men, published in Frontiers of Psychology, suggests that single people reported higher levels of jealousy with their previous partners than people in relationships reported with their current partners.

A breakup is tough to handle and the temptation to get back with the one you lost is often intense. However, while it is not impossible to win back your lost love, make sure that you are not the second choice for anyone. 

Final Thoughts

Dating on the rebound, going too far to seek your ex’s attention, and taking measures that make you seem desperate should be avoided. Ultimately, you deserve the best relationship and a sincere partner. So, don’t let ego be the reason when you chalk up a plan on how to make your ex regret leaving you.  

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Expert Advice On Coping With Feeling Empty After A Breakup

Men After A Breakup- 11 Things You Didn’t Know

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