Let’s make a baby: A man’s and a woman’s point of view

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What do men and women think when they are trying to make a baby

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So what does the word family planning bring to your mind? The very first things? Protection, contraceptives and then immediately your mind pictures a pregnant woman and then a smiling family of three. While this seems so very simple the reality is quite different. And I mean funny different. Ask a couple who have now decided to ditch the pill and go for it, I mean a baby. The entire process is a journey of ups and downs and extremely memorable.

Men and women are wired differently. While both the man and woman aim for the same thing, the thoughts these two species go through during this time are quite different:

What men think?

1. The obvious pressure

Apart from the serious responsibility of parenthood hovering over in a not so distant future, there is bigger pressure point for them- to be able to make a baby. Up until now they never had to worry about the word ‘fertility’. But now sex isn’t just for fun. Earlier it was all about playing the field and now hitting a goal each time you play is crucial and that’s where performance pressure steps in.

2. Baby on my mind

Believe it or not, along with women, the internet history of wanting to be a father will be filled with information on topics like parenthood, childbirth, vaccinations etc. You will read every article you come across that talks about making babies, and what to expect after having them.

3. It is all about positioning

Porn sites will be replaced by websites suggesting best sexual positions for making a baby. Pleasure takes a back step and parenthood steps in.

4. Bye Bye Happy Hours

So after reading all those informative articles about what to do and what not to do, you know to keep the monk in its bottle and now that you’re wiser, you stay away from Budweiser for some time. Probably the biggest sacrifice a man does for the baby before making one.

5. Men talk too

Yes! Men talk! You will seek advice from your classmate who is now expecting his second child or a senior colleague who has been through it all – the anxiety, the failures and the success. Men always share valuable insights from their lives and help a fellow in doubt, especially when it comes to sex!

What women think?

1. Tick tock

The calendar was never dearer to you. You watch it like a hawk, circle the important days, back calculate and set alarms! Be ready to have the most organised sex ever! The 5 most important days of ovulation is every woman’s window of opportunity. Much like a sale which lasts only for a few days, you snooze you lose!

2. Bump everywhere

You can’t help but notice pregnant women everywhere. Almost as if they are following you. Or is it a sign that you are soon going to be one of them? Your second cousin just broke the news of her pregnancy, you now share your desk with a temp because your colleague is on her maternity leave and even your cat is expecting!

3. The false alarms

With hope, come false alarms. And a lot of them. While there are few lucky ones who get it right in the first few attempts, lady luck was never that generous with you. Every time you feel nauseous, or even get a little dizzy, only one thought pops in your head. Could I be? And mostly you are not. It probably is the leftover pizza talking from last night. Sigh!

4. Eat right

Much like your husband, you have decided to eat only healthy stuff, much aware of the fact that your body isn’t going to magically forget the years and piles of junk you made it go through. But it’s never too late to start, right?

5. Maternity wear

You already know what kind of clothes you will be wearing once you are pregnant. You have been making a note of the yay’s and nay’s of maternity wear since the day you decided to jump on the baby wagon and are just waiting for the stick to turn pink!

So while it’s good to prepare yourself, just remember it is not a project you have to complete or a target you have to achieve. It’s a beautiful process of taking your relationship with your better half to the next level. So instead of getting all anxious, enjoy the false alarms, the seemingly never ending wait and most of all, the moment when it actually happens!

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