Why Am I Stalking My Ex On Social Media? – Expert Tells Her What To Do

My Questions and Answers | | Expert Author , Counselling Psychologist & Psychotherapist
Updated On: March 12, 2024
Why Am I Stalking My Ex On Social Media
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I still randomly get the urge to check my ex’s social media account even after breaking up two years back. I am unable to stop myself from stalking my ex on social media. I feel very upset about my own behaviour but somehow I cannot stop myself and move on.   

I Am Stalking My Ex On Social Media

I keep snooping on my ex on social media. I keep checking his friend list, what photos he has uploaded and what comments people are writing. I cannot do away with this urge to stalk my ex.

Related Reading: 12 Signs That You Are Dating A Stalker and need To Breakup

Is it normal to stalk your ex on social media?

Is my behavior normal? I do not know if everyone from a broken relationship behaves the way I am doing. I can spend hours on social media tracing all my ex’s activities and even checking on his interactions with other friends. 

I look up my ex on Facebook everyday

This has become like a ritual. As soon I go to Facebook I first go to my ex’s profile and see what he is up to.

Maybe I keep looking for the signs that he is dating someone else and feel happy when I see he hasn’t uploaded photographs of anyone special.

But it’s been more than a year we have not spoken or messaged and it is very clear that he has moved on.

Is it because I am unable to move on that is why I am stalking my ex on social media? Please help. I want to get out of this habit of obsessing over my ex on social media.  

How do I stop doing this and move on?

Dear Lady, 

The first thing I would ideally look at would be to understand why that urge to stalk your ex on social media still exists. 

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Why the urge still exists to stalk your ex on social media?

Ask yourself, why do I have the urge to look at my ex’s profile? Do I miss him? Am I just curious about what’s happening in their life? Or am I bored?  The next thing to really ask yourself is, what do you expect or achieve by looking at your ex’s social media profile? Will it change anything?

When you find the answers to these questions you will know why you shouldn’t stalk your ex on social media. 

Related Reading: How To Get Over Someone You Love Deeply – 9 Steps To Follow

Block him on social media

However, based on the amount of information I currently have, the first thing would be to block him. Why are you currently still following him or common friends? Sometimes out of sight is really out of mind.

Blocking him and deleting his number is important. Anything that makes it more difficult and increases the effort required to get in touch with him should be done.

Keep yourself busy

As for moving on, everyone moves on at their own pace and in different ways. However there are things that make it easier to move on, such as, keeping yourself busy, going out with friends often, if you are ready try dating new people.

The main goal is to keep yourself busy. Because it’s moments when we are bored or don’t have things to do that our mind starts to wander and we over think. That’s when you end up stalking your ex n social media. 

Know your worth

Another thing that’s important is to always know your worth and be clear of the standards you want in relationships. Always be clear about how you want to be treated and don’t ever settle for anyone who does not treat you well.
I really hope you do find all the happiness you deserve.

Exercise regularly

Exercise is also something that really helps a lot. Exercise releases endorphins which in turn trigger a positive feeling and is therefore, an essential part of mental well being and health.

I really hope you do find all the happiness you deserve.

All the best

Meghna Prabhu

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