There’s always that one person in our life we keep blocking during the day and unblocking in the night (just to take a peek at his profile picture). So if you’ve ever wanted to block your ex and then considered unblocking them too, you’re not alone. You want a preview into his life to see what he’s up to now but also feel disheartened when he’s look oh so good in that Navy Blue shirt you used to love on him. So you consider blocking your ex in order to also block the feelings that come from seeing him.
8 Reasons To Block Your Ex
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Don’t be hard on yourself. It’s utterly relieving to see that he’s gained a little weight or he’s still single, isn’t it? But sugar, that isn’t healthy. Constantly seeing him around on social media will always ensure that him and his memories live rent free in your mind and when you’re trying to get over him, that is just not going to be helpful. Is it immature to block an ex’s number? Not really, if you’re trying to restart your life and you know that seeing them will only make that harder.
We’re not asking you to be hateful or hostile to your ex. The psychology of blocking an ex runs much deeper than that. It’s not just about removing them from your online spaces but also about keeping your sanity intact. If you constantly see him around, your thoughts will be full of ‘What ifs’. Here’s a fool-proof list of eight reasons why it’s important to block your ex to move on!
1. It’ll drain your energy
Trust me; it’s exhausting, heart-wrenching and devastating to see who your ex is following, who’s following him and liking his post-gym selfies. And then you suddenly spot this one pea-brained @cutiegal with bunny filter ‘loving’ all his pictures. The collywobbles set in – “Such a coquette. Does she pick her clothes up from the kids’ section?” – you’re already having a bitchfest with your BFF in London, who starts stalking her profile.
And then before you know it, it’s already midnight, and the chances of you waking up for your 6 am run are reduced to a tiny sliver. Do you need all this unnecessary fluff? Take our advice and consider blocking your ex after a breakup if you really want to save up your time and energy for yourself and start moving on. What’s the point obsessing over somebody who isn’t in your life anymore?
2. The game of comparison
Want to portray a perfect life? Well, there’s no better place than social media to do that. Social media is known for the constant show off to make that ex jealous from displaying your lunch plans to vacations and then scrolling endlessly to check if they’ve seen your story or liked your post or not. If you haven’t blocked your ex yet, you’ll even see his check-ins at exotic locations and stories bursting with colors (and hormones?).
“Eh, I have a better life,” you’ll smirk and book a posh villa ASAP. God forbid it’s your salary day. There’s nothing wrong with going out with your friends and having a good time, but you must do it for yourself and not make your ex go green with jealousy.
3. It’s easier to move on
Trust us, blocking your ex on Whatsapp or other social media handles could really be the best thing you could do for yourself. Let us tell you how. Remember those casual dates you went out for in the early 2000s? Do you think about those guys any more? Of course, you don’t. Also because they’re now fat and bald. But seriously, those breakups didn’t affect us so much. We healed over time and grew out of it. We recovered because we didn’t keep reopening our wounds.
But with some exes, it’s different especially when you have the same friend circle. Our exes hang around all the time now. We also have mutual friends, and that somehow makes it so difficult to move on and forget about them. Someone at a party will always end up asking you about them or bringing them up and thus starts your spiral of misery all over again. Once you block your ex online, you won’t miss him so much because you won’t see him too much. It’ll take time, but you’ll move on eventually.
4. Don’t make excuses
Should you block your ex after a breakup? If you want to move on, yes! Stop giving yourself reasons not to. “He’ll think I hate him”, “That’ll seem so rude” – all these excuses are a mask and you know it. You raise all these concerns about should you block your ex after a breakup because you simply do not want to? It’s true. The real deal is that you just don’t want to get rid of him. Because once you do, you won’t have access to his whereabouts.
But that’s exactly the obsessive behavior we need to stop. You’re just not ready to relocate to another camp because this one has offered comfort for far too long. You’re just trying to dodge the truth in favor of the feel-good fantasy. You clinging onto this fantasy itself is one of the biggest signs you should block your ex today.
5. Free up some space
Whether it’s your wardrobe or your life – everything needs a revamp every once in a while. On our journey, we tend to lose out on so many friends, and we accept the fact that our mission with them was supposed to be a short one. Then why not our exes?
Blocking your ex on Instagram or Facebook will free up a lot of space in your life that you can now give to other and more important things. You won’t have to fret about your display pictures or your status updates anymore! Every time you post a new profile picture, you won’t spend all your time hoping that he sees you and tells you how pretty you look in it. Plus, you’ll open new horizons and get attention from the right people.
Related Reading: 15 Subtle Signs A Breakup Is Near And Your Partner Wants To Move On
6. Banish the ‘oops’ moment
When your ex is on your contact list, there’s a good chance you’ll drunk dial, send crazy drunk texts or butt dial him on a night when you’re out with the girls and having some fun. It’s terrible if he’s awake – you’ll drunk text and won’t remember anything the next morning.
It’s worse if he has slept – he’ll see your messages the following day and want to have a conversation. You’ll begin a brand new day by digging harder into your past, playing blame games and feeling miserable at the end of it all. So if you’re thinking, is blocking your ex immature, remember that it is not. It is far better to keep him out of reach and out of sight rather than finding excuses to create an oops moment!
7. Start from scratch
Never forget the reason why you broke up – it could be a breach of trust, irreconcilable differences or lack of interest. Whatever it is, remind yourself that you are enough; that you don’t need to cling on to someone who doesn’t see your actual value. Start fresh. Delete old chats and emails. Delete his phone number. Get busy.
One of the best reasons for blocking your ex is sometimes just about giving yourself the time to focus on yourself. It is incredible the things you can do and how much better of a person you can be if you simply shun out the negatives and think about your own growth. Your heart and mind needs healing. Worry more about that rather than asking yourself, “Does blocking your ex make them miss you?” You don’t need them to miss you. You need to reinvent yourself.
Related Reading: Looking up your exes on social media? Is there a point?
8. The PMS disaster
Your ex has to be the first person you think of when you’re on one of those notorious mood swings. You’ll abuse him all the time, but there’ll be this sudden surge of emotion just before your period. And if you haven’t blocked him yet, you’ll creep into bed with a tub of ice cream and act all needy because you crave sex and love during PMS and the lack of it frustrates you even more.
You’ll throw out old memories and paint those vivid pictures for him all over again – the time he made hot chocolate and relieved your cramps with a warm water bag. He’ll think you want to get back together, but you’ll also feel nothing after your period arrives. So consider blocking your ex on Whatsapp or Instagram. You’ll do much better that way.
4 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Block Your Ex
Now that we have covered how beneficial it can be to your mood and to your life when you religiously follow blocking your ex online, let’s also touch upon the opposite side of the argument. Sometimes, when your ex stays in your life, it can actually be a really good thing. But all this depends on how much you have grown as a person and whether you have dealt with the heartbreak.
If you are still pining for them, we suggest you stick to blocking your ex and keeping them out. But if you have moved on a considerable amount and are in a genuinely good place in your life – it does not hurt to be acquaintances or friends. So while we have discussed enough reasons to block your ex, here are some why you should not.
1. You want to start a friendship
It is possible that your breakup wasn’t all that ugly but more mutual and amicable. In that case, kudos to you! Such breakups are rare and thus you should try not to spoil things later on. If your breakup wen’t okay and you are convinced that you want to be friends with your ex, then to block your ex on social media is completely out of the question!
If you think you’ll be okay watching them evolve and grow in life, while you do the same, you two have already reached the peak of post breakup maturity and that is fabulous. No need to hit the block button in that case.
Related Reading: Inappropriate Friendships When Married – Here’s What You Should Know
2. You want to give it a second shot
Sometimes we break things off in the heat of the moment out of frustration or anger without actually realizing the consequences of the said breakup. If you think you two broke up in a haste, then thing about why blocking your ex might not be the best decision for you. If you think a reunion is around the corner and it’s only a matter of time until he starts missing you, then wait for him.
It’s possible that even he is just sitting on the other side of the screen and waiting for you to make the first move. Gauge the situation and think about what you want. If this is the case, it is possible that blocking your ex after a breakup might not be the right decision for you.
3. You’re not done with them yet
It’s better to not block your ex on social media rather than leaving things unsaid. If you have a lot of pent up frustration inside you that needs an outlet, we can understand why you shouldn’t block them yet. Perhaps, you two have a lot more to talk about still and blocking your ex will only hinder that process.
Yes, it’s important to block your ex to move on but if you think there is more to be said and done here, then you can pause. There could be stuff that you two still need to work out and talk about more.
4. You have the same friend circle
The thing is that when you and your ex have the same circle of friends, a breakup could put a kink in everybody’s friendships. So if you want to salvage the relationship all of you share as a group, avoid blocking your ex and creating an air of discomfort for everyone. We know it is a big price to pay but in this case, it could be the more mature thing to do instead of jumping at ways to find closure.
Hopefully, now you’ve gotten a fair idea behind the psychology of blocking an ex but also why sometimes, that is not the best case scenario for you. Use these pointers to judge your personal situation and get an understanding of what is the best decision for you. Breakups are a process and sometimes to block an ex can speed up that process. In other cases, not so much. Think it through and make the right decision for yourself today.
It took me 20 long years, but I finally managed to block my ex
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A sensible post written well