Do you often find yourself getting friendzoned, or see people swooning over your friends while you go unnoticed? If yes, it is possible that you exhibit signs of unattractiveness, not necessarily in the sense of physical appearance but personality traits as well. To understand this better, we talked to a California-based psychiatrist and Cognitive Behaviour Therapist, Dr. Shefali Batra (MD in psychiatry), who specializes in counseling for separation and divorce, breakup and dating, and premarital compatibility issues. Here are 16 signs you are unattractive as per the expert.

16 Signs You Are Unattractive — Fix These Now

Do you ever wonder, “Am I ugly?” When you feel unattractive, it’s difficult to tell if you’re actually an unattractive man or unattractive woman or if you just need to build your confidence. Well, here are 16 signs you are ugly or unattractive — and what you can do about them.

1. Avoiding eye contact

If you notice that people often avoid eye contact with you, and not in a coy but awkward way, then chances are that you are not confident and avoid eye contact yourself because you feel unattractive. Dr. Batra says, “Confidence is the key to attractiveness and without it no outfit or accessories could make you look beautiful.”

How to improve

The first step to improving is to accept the issue. If you think you have a low self-esteem, here are some ways to look confident:

• Make eye contact
• Keep a straight posture, don’t slouch
• Smile
• Avoid fidgeting

Related Reading: Why And When A Man Avoids Eye Contact With A Woman – 5 Reasons And 13 Meanings

2. You’re go unnoticed at parties

Are you invisible at parties or any social events? It can be because you don’t have a unique aspect to catch someone’s eye, making you an unattractive man or unattractive woman. Your outfit and overall style is generic and maybe your conversations aren’t that interesting to make you stand out.

How to improve

The trick to standing out in a crowd is to add something that’s ‘you’ — something that is unique to you. This could be:

• An eye-caching dressing style
• Humorous or interesting conversation starters
• Displaying a skill like playing an instrument or something as simple as solving a rubik’s cube

3. “You have a great personality” is a common compliment you get

If you find yourself wondering, “Am I ugly?”, pay attention to what kind of compliments you get. Don’t get me wrong, getting compliments for your personality is great. However, just a generic “You have a great personality” is code for “Your personality outshines your looks.”

How to improve

Dr. Batra says, “Being attractive is not only about having an hourglass figure. There are many small changes you can make to enhance your looks.” Here are some things you can try to catch more eyes:

• Mix up your style
• Try a new haircut
• Explore new accessories such as jewelry, bags, etc.

Related Reading: 20 Interesting Personality Traits Of Pisces Women

4. People avoid sitting near you on public transport

If people usually avoid sitting with you or initiating conversation with you, maybe you have a resting face or a do-not-disturb body language, giving off grumpy vibes. This could be due to unattractive face features, such as droopy eyes or frowned lips, and closed body language.

How to improve

To be attractive and generally more likable, it is important to look approachable. If you look like you are in a bad mood, people will naturally try to avoid you. Here are some tips to look more approachable:

• Avoid crossed arms or keeping your hands in your pockets
• Don’t slouch
• Don’t have headphones on all the time
• Smile
• Make eye contact when appropriate (But don’t just stare at strangers)

Related Reading: Dating And Social Anxiety – 10 Tips To Ace That Date

5. You don’t get matches on dating apps

If your dating app gets more tumbleweeds than matches, it could be one of the 16 signs you are unattractive, or at least your profile is. When was the last time you updated your bio and your profile pic?

How to improve

Dr. Batra says, “Making a good online dating profile is a skill not everyone has. There’s a wide sea of users out there and you need to stand out if you want someone to match with you.” Here are some tips on how to enhance your dating profile:

• Click pictures with your good angles and add them to the profile
• Fill more specific details about you in the profile and not just generic quotes
• Use the questions or prompts to make your profile more interesting

6. You don’t get asked for selfies

If you are not sure how to know if you’re ugly, see if people initiate taking selfies or photos with you. If people don’t ask you to be in their photos or, when they do, you are always hiding in the back in group photos, it can be of the 16 signs you are unattractive or at least look so in pictures. It could be an issue of low self esteem, which stops you from being in the spotlight. Either that, or you just need better friends in your life.

How to improve

No matter how good you look or how interesting of a personality you have, unless you display signs of confidence you will not come off as attractive in real life or in pictures. Some people are naturally more photogenic than others. But that doesn’t mean you can’t improve your selfie-taking skills. Here are some helpful tips:

• Experiment with different angles to see what suits you better
• Practice your smile so that you don’t have a resting face in the picture
• Look up some poses that enhance your body type
• Try to be natural in pictures

Related Reading: Top 10 Couple Poses For Selfies And Unique Pictures To Stand Out

7. You don’t get compliments on your appearance

How to know if you’re ugly? Your outfits or looks don’t get complimented. It could be because they are too repetitive or too basic to attract a woman or a man. Dr. Batra says, “How you dress yourself greatly influences how people perceive you.”

How to improve

Changing your style does not only mean buying new clothes, which is not always possible if you are on a budget. Here are other ways you can enhance your style:

• Figure out what looks good on your body type
• Try mixing and matching different pieces to create more outfits
• Add colorful accessories — a scarf or a bag could do wonders

Related Reading: 13 Female Physical Features That Attract A Man Immensely

8. People laugh at your friends’ jokes more than yours

A study at The University of Texas at Austin found that both sexes are more likely to initiate humor, respond more positively, and consider the other person to be funny when initially attracted to that person. On the flip side, it is also a common notion that people who are funny are deemed more attractive. So maybe your lack of humor is holding you back.

How to improve

While some people are naturally more funny, it doesn’t mean you can’t improve your comedic skills. Here are some tips on how to be more funny:

• Be confident when telling a joke or a funny story
• Work on your timing
• Know your audience — What is funny to a group may to offensive to another
• Loosen up and make jokes at your expense

Related Reading: 31 Funny Ways To Start A Text Conversation And Get Responses!

9. You are often asked if you’re angry/upset/tired

One of the common signs of unattractiveness is having an angry resting face. It makes you look like an unpleasant person and generally unapproachable.

How to improve

Of course, being seen as pleasant and approachable is the first step to being attractive. Try these to change your angry resting face.

• Practice in the mirror
• Be aware of your expressions when in social situations
• Avoid zoning out when in public

10. You get friend-zoned a lot

Being friend-zoned often is one of the 16 signs you are unattractive. Dr. Batra says, “If people like having you as a friend, but don’t seem to be interested romantically, maybe you’re coming off too platonic.” Being a kind and amiable person is enough to befriend someone but when you want to be more than friends, you need to add a little charm to the equation as well.

How to improve

Here are some tips to make someone like you and not just as a friend:

• Hold eye contact just a second longer
• Compliment them
• Add some playful banter or teasing to your conversation
• Occasional flirting to drop hints or test the waters

11. You’re often mistaken for someone else (not a celebrity)

Being mistaken for other people often may indicate that you have a generic appearance and are not standing out in the crowd. This doesn’t necessarily make you unattractive but generally invisible.

How to improve

You can’t be attractive if you have no unique quality that makes you easy to remember or catch someone’s attention. Here are some ways you can stand out in the crowd as per Dr. Batra:

• Find a signature look — glasses, hats, something to make people remember you
• Be true to your style instead of swaying toward every trend that comes and goes
• Explore new hairstyles/beard styles if your current one seems too common

Related Reading: Do Women Like Beards? 5 Reasons Why Women Find Bearded Men Hot

12. People rarely invite you out

Maybe you are just a homebody and people around you know it, which is fine. However, Dr. Batra says, “If you want to get invited but don’t, it could be because you are perceived as uptight, boring, or unpleasant — and these are not the indicator of an attractive person.”

How to improve

Are you giving off “I’d rather stay home” energy even when you don’t want to? Here are some ways to change that:

• Initiate — reach out to people and make plans
• Don’t be too reserved when in a social setting
• Loosen up — laugh, open up, and don’t be too worried about embarrassing yourself

Related Reading: 5 Things That Happen When An Introvert Falls In Love

13. Friends don’t try to set you up

When a person is single, friends often try to play matchmakers and set them up with a potential match. Have your friends tried doing that for you? If not, it may be one of the 16 signs that you are unattractive. It may be because of your looks or poor social skills, or your friends may just think you are not open to dating.

How to improve:

If you are in fact open to dating, there are a few ways to get your friends to find ‘the one’ for you:

• Let your friends know that you’re open to dating and the type of person you are looking for
• Pay attention to your appearance and put efforts in grooming yourself
• Be more engaged in social settings
• Be more positive and upbeat so people perceive you as a pleasant company
• Expand your social circles to meet more people

14. The cute curse

Another one of the signs that you are not good looking guy or gal is that you often get called adorable or cute but never hot or sexy. That is the cute curse and a sure shot path to getting friend-zoned. It doesn’t necessarily mean that you are unattractive, being called cute is, in fact, a compliment. But such a compliment can be given in both romantic and platonic relationships — a child can be called cute or even a puppy. However, when someone calls you hot or sexy, there’s no misinterpreting that signal.

How to improve

Want to dial back the cuteness and raise the hotness meter? Try these tips:

• Switch up your wardrobe — ditch the overly cutesy stuff for something a little edgier
• Pick outfits that accentuate your body shape
• Add a bold element to your look — a piece of jewelry, a bold lipstick shade, a tattoo, etc.

Related Reading: 5 Things Women Find Attractive and Sexy in Men

15. You’re the last to get picked in group activities

Feels like gym class all over again, right? If you’re the last to get picked in team games or any group activities, it can be an indicator that people don’t like you. While this could be due to appearance, it’s more probable that your personality is being disliked in such a scenario. Maybe you’re perceived as passive, lame, or just plain boring.

How to improve

Socializing is nothing but a skill. It may come to some people naturally, but for us awkward introverts (Yes, I am one of you guys), practice makes all the difference.

• Work on your social skills
• Find social circles that match your vibe
• Loosen up and stop taking yourself too seriously

16. people try to avoid or escape interaction with you

Do you often feel that people are trying to leave the conversation or giving you one-word replies? Aside from the possibility that they could just be distracted or a mean person, there’s also a chance that they find the conversation boring or awkward. Dr. Batra says, “Generally, people who can converse fluently and keep it interesting are deemed more attractive and charming.”

How to improve

Want to become better at conversations? Here are some suggestions by Dr. Batra:

• Move the conversation past small talk toward deeper topics
• Talk on common points that are relevant to the other person
• Keep the focus on the other person
• Ask open-ended questions
• Display an engaged body language

Remember, attractiveness is as much about how you carry yourself as it is about your looks!

Final Thoughts

These were the 16 signs you are ugly or unattractive and the ways you can improve them. Remember that at the end of the day, attractiveness is subjective and people have different preferences. So, instead of changing yourself completely to attract someone, work on improving your self-confidence and communication skills and enhance the qualities that make you unique.

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