At some point in your life you will encounter criticism in public from your partner. Dealing with criticism is an important skill in married life. Criticism isn’t easy to accept, but it all depends on how you take the criticism. The reason most of us find it difficult to accept criticism is because it reflects on our perfectionism, insecurities and need for control. But if the criticism is on-going from your partner and is frustrating you, then you need a strategy in place.
How to deal with public criticism from your partner
Table of Contents
1. Get preventive and draw boundaries. You and your partner should sit down and have open communication and come to an understanding that you will not criticise each other in public. Not only the person who criticises, but also the other should be part of the pact.
2. Do not be defensive or start a counter war when criticised. Calm down and appear composed.
3. Put on the shelf temporarily any problems that you have at home while you are socialising. Don’t take your dirty linen into public for washing. Leave that at home and you will see that time can minimise your frustration or hurt.
Related reading: My boyfriend takes everything I say negatively, what do I do?
Stay calm and contemplate
4. Delay your reaction, because no action is better than reaction. Let the criticism marinate on you, so you can reflect if it’s constructive or destructive and how you want to respond. You can leave the room and take a long breath or drink some water for a calming effect.
5. Do not let it remain with you also; calm down and handle it and do away with it.
6. List your grievances to your partner. You both can put anything on the list. Does your partner interrupt too much? Is the tone unbearable? Does the partner become verbally abusive? However, you must also explain why the behaviour bothers you.
Related reading: 5 toxic things you should discard from your relationship right now
7. Develop care signals between your partner and you that you will use in public to alert the partner when he is going overboard with criticism.
8. Retaliate in a dignified way by giving her a piece of your mind in private. Be mindful of your tone and vocabulary in return.
9. Have a “no comparison policy” with your spouse, because comparison is always a part of criticism and comparison works on one’s pride.
“Any fool can criticise, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.” Dale Carnegie
Do not let your own pride be a hindrance, but have the maturity to distinguish between constructive criticism and unnecessary ridicule. As important as it is to handle criticism, it is also vital to ignore it when you can.
Your contribution does not constitute a charitable donation. It will allow Bonobology to continue bringing you new and up-to-date information in our pursuit of helping anyone in the world to learn how to do anything.
Ask Our Expert
You must be Logged in to ask a question.
Featured
Lying By Omission And Its Consequences On Relationships
I Don’t Trust My Boyfriend – 9 Probable Reasons And 6 Helpful Tips
What Is Breadcrumbing In Dating? Signs And How To Respond To It
The Role Of Self-Esteem In Relationships – Take This Test To Assess Yours Today!
Do Long-Distance Relationships Work?
How To Deal With Someone Who Blames You For Everything — 21 Sensible Ways
Does The No Contact Rule After Break Up Work? Expert Responds
Stereotyping Men: Why It’s Time To Think Outside The ‘Man Box’
Why Is Being Single Looked Down Upon? Decoding The Psychology Behind Judgment
Broken Heart Syndrome: When Your Heart Breaks, Quite Literally
15 Tips To Keep A Relationship Strong And Healthy
Attachment Styles Psychology: How You Were Raised Affects Relationships
The Burden of Care, an Often Overlooked Impact of the Pandemic on Women
Marriage Counseling – 15 Goals That Should Be Addressed Says Therapist
Post-Wedding Depression: I Was So Depressed I Tried To Commit Suicide
9 Proven Benefits Of Counseling – Don’t Suffer In Silence
Giving Too Much In A Relationship? How Much To Give Of Yourself
Dating As A Single Mom – 9 Tips
Having a Relationship With An Introvert? 7 Tips For Dating An Introvert
How To Watch Out For The Relationship Red Flags – Expert Tells You