Every man has asked himself this question, ‘Is she playing hard to get?’ As men, it is important for us to know if a woman is attracted to you. It is all too common that a man invests his time and effort into a romantic prospect only to later find out that he read the situation wrong and she was never attracted to him.
13 Signs A Girl Likes You But Is Playing Hard To Get
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Knowing the signs that a woman is playing hard to get is not only important to avoid an awkward situation like this, but also to avoid being labelled a creep for constantly pursuing a woman who is not attracted to you. So here are a few ways you can tell if she is playing hard to get or if she is just not into you at all.
1. She doesn’t say ‘no’
Let us start with the easiest sign a girl likes you but is playing hard to get. If a woman is not attracted to you, she will simply tell you so, politely or otherwise. She will not let you question whether she likes you or not, instead, she will make it abundantly clear that she is not attracted to you.
If she is playing hard to get, however, she will not say no to your efforts to try to spend more time together. It is highly unlikely that she would agree to meet the first time you ask her out, deciding to postpone instead. If she is playing hard to get, she will not shut you down, but she will make you chase her. You will feel the signs that she wants to be your girlfriend…
2. She says she has a busy schedule
The first few times you ask a woman out, she will most likely say that she is busy that day, that she had already made plans with another friend or that she has been invited to a party she planned on attending. She always seems to be busy and it might seem like she is trying to avoid you.
Women do this for two major reasons. One is that they do not want to seem desperate. Secondly, they want to make sure that you like them enough to be patient and that you are not just looking for a fling or something meaningless. They want to know that you are looking for a serious relationship.
3. She suggests date ideas
She does this subtly. It is never going to be something obvious like, “I want to go out with you.” Instead, she will subtly tell you things she would like to do on a date. She might say that there is a certain festival or restaurant she has been thinking about visiting. Or she might say that she feels bored and wonders what the city looks like. Well, this is what date ideas would sound like, wouldn’t they?
There are hundreds of things she might say, the important thing to look out for is that she has suggested an activity the two of you could do together, but it is up to you to actually suggest going together
Related Reading: How To Date A Girl Out Of Your League?
4. She avoids you on her bad days
Most men can attest to the fact that women cancel the plans you made together. The reason is mostly medical, a friend got hurt and they need to go to the doctor, etc. Now, this could be true, but it most likely is not. If a girl is playing hard to get, she will try to avoid you on days she feels that she is not at her best. It could be something minor like they feel that they are having a bad hair day, or that they would not make for very pleasant company that day. If a girl likes you, she tries to put her best foot forward and so tend to cancel plans if they don’t feel at their best.
This is not to infer that she is a selfish girlfriend, but just that she wants to be her best when she is with you.
5. She seems like two different people
This is very confusing at times. One day she is warm and flirty towards you, but the next day she barely acknowledges your presence. It makes you wonder if she really likes you or not. Or are you her backup plan or something.
It might even seem like you are talking to a different person. If she seems to switch between these two personas like this, chances are she likes you and is playing hard to get to keep you interested.
Related Reading:15 Cute Ways To Prove To Your Girlfriend That You Love Her
6. She tells you about other guys interested in her
If a woman is playing hard to get, she would probably tell you about the other guys she has in her life. They do this to make you jealous or to simply annoy you. This one seems counter-intuitive but it is a very common behaviour amongst women. If she just thinks of you as her friend, she has absolutely no reason to tell you how many other guys are into her. She will only tell you about other guys to see how you react and to prompt you into making your move before someone else does.
7. She takes the time to present herself
When a woman is playing hard to get, she does her best to look her best when she is around the person she likes. This goes above and beyond their personal grooming standards. If they think they might come across the person they like, women would devote more time than they normally would to present themselves i.e. spend more time on hair and makeup etc. If a woman always looks gorgeous when you see her and you have not yet seen her on her off days, chances are she is playing hard to get.
8. She takes a long time to respond
This happens quite often amongst men; you’re texting a woman but she always takes so long to respond and you are not sure if you are bothering her or if she is playing hard to get. Double texting may not be always right either. Unfortunately, long response times could mean either of those things. Fortunately, here is how you can tell the difference. If a woman responds after a long time and her responses are curt or monotonous, she is not playing hard to get, she is hoping you will get bored and leave her alone.
Now you also need to keep the conversation interesting and engaging. If this is a green checkmark, then the conversation will flow. If she is playing hard to get, her responses will be funny and she will genuinely try to contribute to the conversation.
Related Reading: We Couldn’t End Our Relationship Nor Do We See A Future Together…
9. She tries to maintain a mystery
When a woman likes someone, she does not want to seem too boring, as such, she will try to keep the guy she likes guessing. She will tend to give cryptic answers, or subtly allude to her likes and interest without actually telling you how much she likes it.
This could manifest in small behaviours or verbal conversations. It is understandable why they do this, but it could be jarring as she could seem apathetic at times. The best thing to do is to be patient, if she is constantly withholding from you, she is not playing hard to get.
10. She refuses your help
This is one of the lesser-known signs that she is playing hard to get, but also how you can tell if she views you as a romantic interest, or as a friend. If she just views you as a friend, she would not mind if you do small things for her, like bring her a few napkins or carry something heavy. If she is interested in you, however, she will not give you the opportunity to do these things, opting to do them herself instead. They do this to try to show that they can function independently and to establish themselves as individuals.
11. She is affectionate
This one is very hard to miss. If a woman is interested in you her behaviour and attitude towards you will be kind and warm. She will be empathetic to what you say, will dismiss the cringe-worthy or slightly stupid things you do and she will try her best to make you feel glad to be around her. This one is pretty obvious but if you are still worried that you might be reading into it, look for signs physical contact. Does she touch your arms, does she shy away from you or move in closer. If she does let you get close to her, she is interested in you.
Related Reading: How To Keep Calm When Your Girlfriend Talks To Other Guys
12. She finds you funny
You may have a great sense of humour and you may even be great at telling jokes, but even you know that a lot of your jokes are not actually that good. If she always laughs at your jokes though, that is a good sign that she likes you but is playing hard to get. Trying telling a few unfunny jokes, if she laughs at most of them, she is definitely interested in you. Keep in mind though that she does not actually find all of it funny, she just does not want you to feel bad.
13. Her friends know you
Well, this one is slightly different. If there is still some doubt as to whether a girl is playing hard to get, you could always try to find out if her friends know about you. If she is interested in you, she has definitely talked to her closest friends about you. If you get a chance to interact with her friends, try to see if her friends give you an indication that she talks about you. If she hasn’t told her friends about you, chances are she is not interested in you romantically.
Hopefully, this has given you a better understanding of signs that a woman is playing hard to get. Learn to recognize these signs and it will become so much easier to know if a woman views you as a romantic prospect or not.
My girlfriend of seven years is marrying someone else and I’m feeling used and discarded
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