Have you ever noticed that when a relationship enters troubled waters, people reminisce about their initial love-struck days? “He was such a sweetheart when we started going out. He took such good care of me.” “When we first started going out, she was so thoughtful and caring. Wish I could get that version of her back.” In relationship parlance, we call those good old days the honeymoon phase or the cupcake phase. Given how bright and rosy everything seems, it’s only natural to wonder, “How long does the honeymoon phase last?” 

Whether you’re on the brink of a new relationship or your current partnership doesn’t feel like the bed of roses it used to be, awareness about what happens when the honeymoon period fades can help you navigate the different stages of falling in love a little better. So, grab your coffee and sit tight as we are about to serve you the whole nine yards of the honeymoon episode with a side of what comes after the honeymoon phase in a relationship.

What Is The Honeymoon Phase Of A Relationship?

The honeymoon phase refers to the very beginning of a new relationship when a couple goes through an ecstatic state of intense passion, love, and physical attraction. In every waking moment, you keep thinking about this special person. You feel so in love you can’t stop smiling involuntarily. The heart races the moment you see them and you lit up like a million fireflies!

It’s that dating phase where you love more fight less; it’s a phase of countless romantic dates and endless conversations. Spending quality time with your bae becomes your top priority. Not to mention sexual sparks fly high in the honeymoon phase of a relationship. You can hardly keep your hands off each other. 

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During these early days, you both are always on your best behavior. From changing your wardrobe and buying expensive gifts to staying up all night to chat, you can go to any extent to make this person fall for you even more. In the first few months, you look at your new partner through rose-colored glasses of awe and admiration. It leaves you hypnotized by their charm. They can do no wrong, they can’t say a bad thing. Most couples don’t even notice any red flags until they explore the other complicated stages of falling in love.

How Long Does The Honeymoon Phase Last?

Now, it’s time to address the elephant in the room – how long is the honeymoon phase in a relationship? More importantly, can the honeymoon phase last forever? Well, as much as you want to hold on to the romantic tête-à-têtes and the passionate sex, the cupcake phase is a fun ride that inevitably comes to an end.

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To find an answer to, how long does the honeymoon phase last, you have to understand that this thrill, excitement, the very feeling of ‘being in love’—it’s all a mere outcome of certain chemical reactions in our brain. Let’s explore some research data:

• According to a study, the sustenance of romantic love is associated with the activation of dopamine and oxytocin-rich regions of the brain
• Another article published in Scientific American talks about a study that reveals how people who have just fallen in love have a higher level of nerve growth factor than those who are single or in long-term relationships. A higher NGF score suggests increased emotions of euphoria and attachment in a person. What’s interesting is that the NGF and cortisol level difference between these two groups receded within 12-24 months
• As spoken to Scientific American by Gary W. Lewandowski, Jr., associate professor of psychology at Monmouth University, “These findings suggest that romantic love is an arousing but stressful experience. These physiological changes are short-lived, perhaps because we become acclimated to our partner with time.”

And that’s one of the major reasons the honeymoon period wears off eventually. So, how long is the honeymoon phase in a relationship? That varies from couple to couple as every relationship progresses at its own pace. As rare as it is, some couples might even respond in the affirmative to the question, can the honeymoon phase last forever? That too, after thirty-forty years of their marriage.

Exceptions aside, typically, the honeymoon phase of a relationship can last anywhere from a few weeks to a few months or even up to a year. According to a 2015 study, the honeymoon period can last from six months to almost 2.5 years. But most people can’t manage to keep the spark alive after the very early stages and that’s completely normal. It’s in no way an indication that you’re not in a happy, healthy relationship. 

How to recognize that the honeymoon phase is over?

There is no way of predicting how long does the honeymoon phase last. And if you ask us, you shouldn’t keep an eye out for it either. It will only ruin the pure magic of the honeymoon phase of a relationship. For as long as you can love more fight less, and enjoy intense physical intimacy, cherish this blissful spell in your life. However, if you are starting to feel like something’s wrong between you and your bae, it’s probably because the short-and-sweet bubble of the cupcake phase is finally popping. Here are a few signs to recognize that the honeymoon phase is over:

• As your rose-tinted glasses come off, you now see your partner in a realistic light which makes their negative traits and annoying habits more prominent 
• After the dopamine high wanes, ordinary activities like watching a movie together or going for a walk that felt so exhilarating earlier become mundane
• During the post-honeymoon phase, you start spotting the relationship red flags which, like it or not, leads to more disagreements and arguments 
• Your sex life too takes a hit at this dating phase. The blazing physical attraction of the early stages slowly fizzles out
• You cut back on the quality time you spend together. Not meeting each other every day becomes a normal occurrence 
• After the infatuation period, you stop pretending to be the pristine souls and be comfortable enough to see each other in your PJs and messy hair or perhaps use a swear word or two in front of them

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What Comes After The Honeymoon Phase In A Relationship?

Now that we have a fair idea of how long is the honeymoon phase in a relationship let’s get cracking what comes after the honeymoon phase in a relationship. First, you have to realize that this is just a dating phase, not a parameter of your feelings for each other. The honeymoon phase withering away doesn’t equal falling out of love with your partner.

It’s not the end of the world; you are just transitioning to the next pitstop in the different stages of falling in love. If you are worried about the kind of future you can expect with your partner, let’s walk you through the different junctures of attachment that follow the honeymoon phase of a relationship:

1. Disillusionment 

The very next stage you embark upon brings in all kinds of insecurities, uncertainties, and reality checks. Suddenly something starts to feel off in your relationship. Your partner slips from the pedestal you put them on and you see them for who they truly are.  

If one partner is too bossy, overly possessive, or emotionally a few steps behind the other, it will induce a power struggle between them. With one person taking charge or being emotionally unavailable, the other partner will question their compatibility, feel insecure about the very foundation of the relationship, and doubt any possibilities of future happiness with each other. 

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How to navigate the disillusionment phase

Going through the disillusionment phase is the hardest part for all couples. With the slightest inconvenience, you might feel an urge to end things for good. But we have a few clever tricks for you to weather the storm and come out of it stronger as a couple:

• Remember to stand your ground steady while making some space for changes 
• You need to make a conscious effort to accept the differences and respect your partner’s individuality 
• Open communication is always the best solution to affirm your needs and understand each other’s expectations from this relationship
• Both partners need to be equally on board in this journey to build a healthy relationship
• Of course, you should try hard to make it through this stage but never give up on your values and boundaries and compromise on the non-negotiables 

2. Attachment 

Yes, keeping the spark alive may seem like a daunting task now. But what comes after the honeymoon phase in a relationship is far more rewarding than the sheer thrill of a budding romance. In the attachment stage, you experience emotional connection and vulnerability and get to see each other’s raw, authentic selves. It’s in this stage that both partners start to depend on each other. They build trust and gather unwavering willpower to stick together, no matter the odds. 

How to navigate the attachment phase

Your relationship isn’t shatterproof just yet. As you discover each other in a new light, there’s still a lot of wonder, disappointment, grief, and frustration in store for you. New challenges will unlock every other day. The lifespan of your relationship boils down to how you handle all these feelings and work your way up to a committed relationship. Here’s what we suggest:

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• This is your chance to get to know your partner on a deeper level. So spend time with them as much as possible
• Don’t shy away from being vulnerable in front of them
• Learn and acknowledge each other’s insecurities, scars, and darkest thoughts. It’s an important building block of a strong emotional bond
• Take an interest in what your partner is passionate about. Try to analyze things from their perspective. Flying solo isn’t a sign of healthy relationships. You have to be a team player
• Don’t sweep your problems under the rug. For a sustainable partnership, keep a solution-oriented approach to conflict resolution

3. Stable partnership

Do you remember how we started this discussion? Can the honeymoon phase last forever? I think you will agree that as much as we all root for the fairytale love to never fade, this final dating phase is our end goal. After floating through the troubled waters for so long you finally reach a calm, stable state. 

No more surprises left; you have nothing to hide from each other. Together you have created a safe nest to nurture your love. You get a sense of comfort and security in each other’s company. Taking a leap with your partner like moving in together or getting engaged seems more feasible at this point. Once again, you love more fight less!

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How to navigate a stable partnership

First of all, big applause to you and your partner for making it this far. We can see you are practically inseparable. But love is like a kite that will slip off your grip if you are not paying attention for even a little while. Since we all want a fairytale ending for your relationship, here are a few pointers to strengthen the bond with your partner:

• Don’t let your love sink under the grocery bills and office presentations. To keep the spark alive, keep dating each other, spend quality time, bring them flowers, plan surprises, go on vacations 
• When you become too complacent in a relationship, you tend to take each other for granted. To not turn into that distant, arrogant partner, express your gratitude, tell them how much you love them at least once every day, and always try to be true to your words
• Value the commitment you have made toward one another. Without loyalty and transparency, the whole foundation might collapse like a house of cards 
• For some couples, physical attraction might be scarce after reaching this point. There are plenty of ways to spice things up in the bedroom – off the top of my head, roleplay?

Final Thoughts 

Now that you have the answer to, how long does the honeymoon phase last, Or are you ready to explore the upcoming adventures hand in hand with your sweetheart? Yes, the early stages are easy-going. There’s thrill, eagerness, and an all-consuming magnetic attraction that keep you glued to your partner. And that serves as the foundation of a relationship. 

That being said, there’s no need to feel daunted by the probable hardships of the post-honeymoon period. Treat the end of your honeymoon days as a new beginning, full of possibilities. No matter what stage of the relationship you are at, what’s important is that you value each other’s presence in your lives, respect each other’s individuality and keep your love alive for an eternity.

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