If you have already experienced ghosting, you know how painful it can be. It is terrible enough when a relationship comes to an end but it is even worse when the other person simply disappears into the wind like they never existed. Sadly, some people are cruel enough to leave without any confrontation. It’s what’s known as ghosting, and it sure hurts a lot. No meeting, no call, not even a goodbye text.
No matter how fleeting the connection, being cast aside so unceremoniously can have a severe impact on your emotional well-being. As a result, a slew of thoughts follow, most of which lead to more questions than answers. “What just happened?” “Did this person just disappear on me?” And perhaps, most importantly, “What next?” Let’s put all your questions to bed and give you a chance to take the power back from the ghoster. To that end, we present to you the 80 best ghosting responses that are sure to sting the recipient. But before that, let’s take a look at what is ghosting as well as how to deal with being ghosted.
What Is Ghosting?
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For the uninitiated, let’s first address the question of what is ghosting. The Oxford Dictionary definition of ghosting is “the practice of ending a personal relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication.” A person who ghosts someone refuses to answer any calls or texts of their previous romantic interest. They leave without any acknowledgment and pretend as if any type of relationship never existed.
However, to truly understand this phenomenon, we need to look beyond the definition of ghosting and make an attempt to explore the psychology of not responding to text messages, calls, or any attempts at establishing communication after unilaterally deciding to end a relationship without even discussing it with or informing the other person.
Psychologically, it can be a defense mechanism to sidestep difficult conversations or the anxiety of confronting someone’s feelings. Ghosters may struggle with emotional intimacy or fear rejection themselves. However, that doesn’t make things any easier for the person ghosted. It can lead to feelings of confusion, insecurity, and abandonment, impacting their trust in future relationships. The lack of closure can make things worse.
Perhaps it’s the lack of closure that hurts most after getting ghosted, the tinge of hope that they might just come back and drop in a “Hey”. This often stops a person from calling out someone who ghosted them. The unwillingness to accept that this just happened may also in some cases cause long-lasting mental harm and self-esteem issues that may continue to plague your next few relationships.
When it’s all unfolding before your eyes, it’s hard to see how you might get over this…humbling experience. “What do you text after being ghosted?” you might ask yourself as if that will somehow magically reverse the entire situation. Unexpected ghosting leaves one wondering about the worst-case scenarios for a long time until they come to an acceptance that they have been ghosted.
Related Reading: When I Was Subjected To ‘Ghosting’ In My Relationship
11 Tips On How To Deal With Being Ghosted
Being cut out from someone’s life without any information or conversation can be really painful. Not amount of understanding of the reasons why someone would ghost you or the psychology of not responding to text messages or attempts at re-establishing communication can make it easy. When suddenly realize you have been ghosted, your mind churns a slew of questions to make sense of why it happened. Why do people ghost? What does being ghosted mean for you or say about you? And how do you deal with being ghosted?
Even the best ghosting responses might not be able to overturn what just happened, since the person who ghosted you probably made their mind up long before they pulled the plug. Whether it is an online dating partner or your romantic interest, being ghosted does bring its share of hurt, pain, and trauma. It’s important to learn how to deal with being ghosted the right way to prevent it from taking a toll on your mental health. Here are 11 tips that can help:
1. Calm yourself down
It can be unnerving and plain frustrating to realize that the person you thought you clicked with isn’t responding to your calls and is leaving your texts on seen. However, you need to try not to lose your cool. You’re angry and you’re hurting. It is absolutely understandable. But don’t let anger or pain get the better of you.
It might hit you all of a sudden, it’s likely the realization crept in like an unwanted sickness, but even so, the pain that comes with it might lead you to take some drastic steps. That’s why the first and foremost step you need to in your journey to figure out how to deal with being ghosted is to process your emotions. It will take time, but you need to give yourself a space to breathe and think objectively. Take this as a painful yet important learning lesson.
2. Snap out of denial
You have calmed yourself down, you’re taking deep breaths, but you are still unable to wrap your head around the fact that you have been ghosted. You don’t know how to survive this betrayal. Upon being ghosted, most people keep giving their romantic interest the benefit of the doubt, thinking they are incapable of pulling something of this kind.
You need to bring yourself out of denial. No, this person is not going to come back in a couple of days, apologizing for not having replied. No, their phone hasn’t gotten stolen or lost, if it did, they’d find a way to text you after a while. It may be hard to come to terms with getting ghosted, but the best way to get out of denial is to say to yourself, “She/he ghosted me”.
It can also be helpful to bear in mind that perhaps they ghosted you for reasons that have nothing to do with you, like an ex coming back or just them having wildly disproportionate expectations. Accept that you’ve been ghosted, and put the effort into dealing with it in a healthy manner.
3. Do not beg at all
Do you still message your romantic interest thinking they will have a sudden epiphany that you are indeed their soulmate because you really care? Are you incessantly messaging them with things like “I miss you”, “Where are you?”, “I am making your favorite dish”, or the worst of all, “I am wearing your favorite dress”, just so that they would reply to you? Well, please stop! None of these is a high-value response to ghosting or a dignified way of dealing with the situation.
A person who does not have the courtesy to come clean about their feelings does not deserve even a little bit of your attention. Accept that you’ve been ghosted and move on. Begging them to respond is only going to push them away even further. The best ghosting revenge is to become a ghost yourself.
4. Send one last text
One of the worst feelings while being ghosted is the oscillation of emotions between the desperate need to see your phone beep with their text and throwing anything in your sight at the person who ghosted you because they hurt you. Take one moment and pause the swinging. To put an end to questions like why do people ghost or what does being ghosted mean for you swirling in your head, send them one last text to give them a chance to explain themselves.
If you wish to, you can even make it clear to them that this is the last time you’re messaging them. If they reply, great. If they don’t, there can be no better time to recover from ghosting. When they don’t reply to the final message you send them, it’s basically them screaming “I don’t respect you” without really saying anything to you. The most high-value response to ghosting in that case would be radio silence from your end.
5. It is okay to grieve
Since confronting a ghoster is not possible because they have vanished from the scene, you will be left with many questions and a knot in your stomach. You cannot plot your ghosting revenge because you don’t know where to find them. It is completely understandable to be dejected and heartbroken. Eventually, you will feel better, but right now, you might want to grieve. Do not stop yourself from doing so.
Grieving is just as important a step to deal with ghosting as any other. You cannot expect yourself to be okay the very next moment. So be kind to yourself. It is okay to feel sad. It is okay to put your head on your best friend’s shoulder and cry. After all, that person meant something to you.
6. Don’t blame yourself
In every split between two people, the innocent one tends to take the entire blame on themselves, when it is not really their fault. You are probably doing it too. You’re probably thinking, “Maybe I was too clingy and that killed our relationship” or “Maybe I expected too much” or “I was not good enough for them.”
You need to stop blaming yourself right now. It is not your fault that another adult did not have enough sense to talk to you about it. It is not your fault that they do not understand the meaning and importance of communication. Ghosting hurts, but you did not cause this pain to yourself. Someone else caused it too. The sooner you realize that the sooner you will be able to deal with ghosting in a healthier manner.
7. Take care of your health, no matter what
Binge eating ice cream and fried stuff can help you feel better, but it is not healthy in the long run. Believe me, eating healthy and working your body by exercising or going for a run is going to make you feel much more refreshed, energetic, and rejuvenated. Exercising can help you cope with your emotions.
Treat those unhealthy delicacies simply as food, do not substitute them with love. You’re already not in good mental shape. If your health goes downhill, you will not feel better any sooner. Eat healthy, work out, and throw away those tubs of ice cream, boxes of pizzas, and cartons of cigarettes. Make yourself a healthier person and you will see the difference.
Related Reading: Ghosting In Relationship: What Does It Mean In A Relationship
8. Be thankful they left
The last thing you need in your life is any form of negativity. You may not want to believe it, but you have honestly dodged a bullet. Be thankful. Once you’re able to clear the cloud of grief in your mind, you will be able to look at the bigger picture, and the bigger picture is certainly brighter and more beautiful. You will thank your stars that they left, and you will finally recover from ghosting. You’ll figure out how to get over unrequited love, and this is the best way to respond to ghosting.
9. Meet new people
One mistake most people make while trying to come to terms with getting ghosted is letting this one unsavory experience get in the way of making new connections. You may fear going down that road again but you need to tackle that emotion of being terrified. Take your time, but let yourself be vulnerable at some point in time. Meet new people and start dating again. You will see that dating is not as bad as it once seemed and that there are people like you who have been hurt in the past, but they have emerged stronger. You will eventually find someone with shared interests and shared emotions.
10. Think about the reason behind ghosting
This step brings a learning curve that can help you steer clear of the pain of being ghosted in the future. Once you’ve successfully figured out how to respond to ghosting, ponder over your relationship with the person and try to identify the red flags that may have pushed them to do something like this. It is unusual that a person would just vanish out of nowhere.
Think about what happened. Did you both fight regularly and the other person chose flight? Or did they always seem distant and disinterested? However, keep in mind that the objective here is not to blame yourself for someone else’s actions but to diminish the likelihood of getting ghosted again. Making peace with your past is the best way forward and also a smart way of dealing with ghosting.
Related Reading: The 7 Components Of Male Psychology During No-Contact Rule – Backed By An Expert
11. Seek professional help
If nothing works for you and you’re just unable to deal with being ghosted, please seek professional help. Talking to a therapist is the safest place where you can vent your emotions and not worry about being judged. They will guide you in a much more professional manner, and help you recover from ghosting much faster. Do make a call to a counselor if you feel you need it. There is no issue too small to talk to a counselor about. If you’re in need of help but don’t know where to look, skilled and experienced counselors on Bonobology’s panel are here for you.
How To Respond To Ghosting — 80 High-Value Responses
There is something about being ghosted that riles you up and leaves you unsettled. While we’re all for adopting healthy strategies on how to deal with being ghosted, sometimes sending that one final text can be cathartic. The other person may not have left you in a situation where you’re forced to figure out how to move on without closure but know that you can offer it to yourself.
Send that one last text packed with all the angst and restlessness you’re feeling and then focus on healing and moving on. What do you text after being ghosted, you ask? From funny ghosting responses like the number you are trying to reach text to more straightforward, emotional, or open-ended texts, there is no dearth of options available to you. You just have to choose the one that best resonates with your state of mind.
To help you make a choice you’d be pleased with, we bring you 80 examples of how to respond to ghosting. Whether ghosted after sex, a first date, the talking stage, or while in an exclusive relationship, whether you’re wondering how to respond to a ghoster who comes back or how to react to soft ghosting, there’s something for everyone here. Let’s dive right in and help you find the perfect high-value response to ghosting:
How to respond to ghosting in the talking stage
Even though the talking stage is all about a surface-level connection, being ghosted can still sting. But not enough to cause any lingering hurt. So, you can play around with light or funny ghosting responses just to get a sense of what’s going on at the other person’s end. Here are a few examples:
- “Hey, just checking in! Haven’t heard from you in a bit. Hope everything’s going well on your end.”
- “Hey, I noticed we haven’t spoken in a while. Are you still interested in continuing the conversation?”
- “Hey! Not sure if you got caught up with something, but just wanted to check in. Let me know if you’re still around.”
- “Did you accidentally join a witness protection program? Just kidding, but it’s been a while. Hope everything’s good!”
- “Hey, I noticed we haven’t been talking much lately. I’m cool if you’re not feeling this, but it would be great to know where we stand.”
- “I’ve enjoyed getting to know you, but I’m not sure what’s going on since I haven’t heard from you. I’d appreciate it if we could have an honest conversation about where this is going.”
- “Looks like you’ve gone MIA! No worries, I’ll take that as a sign. Take care!”
- “I’ve noticed the communication has dropped off. If you’re no longer interested, just let me know so I can move forward.”
- “Hey, I hope everything is okay with you. I understand if life has gotten busy or something came up, but I’d appreciate a heads-up if you’re not feeling this anymore.”
- Don’t bother responding, there’s plenty of fish in the sea
Related Reading: Why Do Guys Stop Texting And Then Start Again? 12 True Reasons Why
How to respond to being ghosted after sex
Ooooh, getting ghosted after sex is awful. Whether it was a casual hook-up or a person you’ve been dating up and vanished after sleeping with you, this sudden withdrawal can dent your self-esteem and leave you riddled with self-doubt. It’s easy to lose your composure and say or do things that will make you feel even worse. To prevent that from happening, we’ve come up with some dignified responses to being ghosted after sex:
- “Hey, I haven’t heard from you since we were together. If you’ve decided not to continue this, I’d appreciate some clarity so I can move on.”
- “So, I guess you got what you wanted and disappeared? No hard feelings, but a little heads-up next time would be appreciated!”
- “I enjoyed our time together, but your silence afterward speaks volumes. It’s okay if you’re not interested in continuing, but communication would have been better.”
- “I understand if you’ve had second thoughts, but I think it’s fair to communicate after what we shared. It would have been respectful to say something.”
- “Looks like I won’t be hearing from you again. No worries, take care!”
- “Wow, did you vanish into thin air? I don’t expect much, but a little decency wouldn’t hurt!”
- “I felt a connection between us, and I thought you did too. I’m not sure what happened, but I would have appreciated some honesty instead of being left in the dark.”
- “I get the message from your silence. I hope you find what you’re looking for, and I’ll do the same. Take care!”
- “If you weren’t interested in taking things further, I would have preferred a quick message instead of being ghosted. Anyway, good luck!”
- “I thought we had a nice connection, but I haven’t heard from you since. If something changed for you, I’d appreciate knowing.”
Related Reading: First Date Nerves – 13 Tips To Help You Ace It
How to respond to being ghosted after first date
What is a high-value response to ghosting when someone vanishes after a first date? Well, it really depends on how much you liked them and what your expectations were. If the date was a dud, you can just dust yourself off and move on. In fact, the silver lining to being ghosted after first date in this case is that you don’t have to be the one to pull the plug. But if you enjoyed yourself and liked the person and they ended up ghosting you, here is what you can say to get the irritability and annoyance out of your system:
- “Hey! I had a great time on our date. Haven’t heard from you since, though! Just wanted to check in—hope all’s good!”
- “Hey, I enjoyed our date but noticed you’ve gone quiet. If you’re not interested, I’d appreciate it if you just let me know.”
- “Did you fall into a black hole after our date? Hope everything’s alright on your end!”
- “Hey, I haven’t heard from you since our date, so I’m going to assume you’ve lost interest. It would have been great to get some closure, but I wish you well.”
- “I get that things don’t always work out after a date, but I would have appreciated a heads-up if you weren’t feeling it.”
- “Looks like we’re not going for round two. No worries, take care!”
- “I really enjoyed our time together, and I thought we had a connection. I’m not sure what happened, but I would have appreciated a bit of communication instead of being left wondering.”
- “I thought we had a good time, but your silence tells me otherwise. It would have been nice to hear from you, but I’m moving forward.”
- “I noticed you’ve gone silent after our date. No hard feelings, but I prefer straightforward communication, so I’ll take this as your way of saying you’re not interested. Good luck!”
- “Hey, you have gone quiet since our date. Looks like I found myself a ghoster!”
Related Reading: 11 Types Of Casual Relationships That Exist
How to respond to ghosting when dating casually
When you’re dating casually, the unsaid understanding is that the relationship has a short shelf-life and you continue to enjoy each other’s company but there are no expectations of a future together. Even so, a conversation about ending things is any day a better alternative to being ghosted and left in the dark. If someone you were dating casually pulls that on you, here is how you can respond:
- “Hey, stranger! Haven’t heard from you in a bit. Hope everything’s good on your end!”
- “Hey, I noticed you’ve gone quiet. If you’re no longer interested, no hard feelings. I just would’ve appreciated a heads-up.”
- “Did you take up ghost-hunting or are you just practicing disappearing acts? Let me know if you’re still around!”
- “Hey, I get that things can fizzle out, but I would have preferred a little communication instead of silence. Wishing you the best!”
- “It seems like you’ve gone quiet, and that’s fine, but it would have been nice to hear from you directly. Take care!”
- “Hey, I hope everything’s okay. If you’ve decided not to continue this, I’d appreciate a quick message just to close things off.”
- “Looks like we’ve both moved on. No hard feelings—take care!”
- “I enjoyed spending time together, so I was surprised when you stopped replying. I would have appreciated knowing what changed.”
- “It seems like you’re not interested anymore, and that’s okay. It would’ve been nice to hear from you, though. All the best!”
- Block and move on
How to respond to being ghosted by someone you were dating exclusively
Dealing with being ghosted when dating exclusively is a toughie. Mainly because the relationship has enough depth and value that you don’t expect your partner to just up and vanish. Coming to terms with the blow of unexpected ghosting from someone you cared about and had feelings for can be an excruciating journey. Getting the anger and hurt out of your system can help. Here is what you can say to someone you ghosted you while dating exclusively:
- “Hey, I haven’t heard from you in a while, and it feels like you’re pulling away. If this is your way of ending things, I’d appreciate some honesty so we can both move forward.”
- “I’m confused by the silence, especially since we were serious. I hope everything is okay on your end. If you’ve decided to end things, I’d appreciate hearing from you directly.”
- “I’ve noticed you’ve gone quiet, and it’s disappointing after we’ve been exclusive. If this is the end for you, I deserve at least a message saying so.”
- “I’m feeling hurt and confused by your silence, especially since I thought we were building something real. If something changed for you, I wish you’d just talk to me about it.”
- “I don’t know what happened, but being ghosted in an exclusive relationship isn’t what I expected. I deserve an explanation, and it would be good to have closure.”
- “I thought we were on the same page, but it seems like you’ve checked out. I deserve better than being ghosted, and I’ll take your silence as a sign to move on.”
- “So, are you auditioning for a disappearing act, or did something serious happen? Jokes aside, I’d appreciate some communication about what’s going on.”
- “I didn’t expect this kind of silence in an exclusive relationship. If you’ve decided to end things, I would have appreciated a conversation instead of being left in the dark.”
- “I’m not sure what happened, but we were serious enough that I thought we could communicate openly. I hope we can have an honest conversation about what’s going on.”
- “We’ve been pretty close, so it’s confusing not hearing from you. If you’ve decided to move on, I’d appreciate an honest conversation instead of silence.”
Related Reading: 15 Signs You Are In A Serious Relationship
How to respond to being ghosted in a steady relationship
Speaking of unexpected ghosting, this almost never happens. If you are in a steady relationship, your partner will likely have a breakup conversation with you no matter how hard or ugly it gets. Given how complicated human relationships can be, the possibility cannot be ruled out completely either. If you’re ever in this unfortunate situation, here is how to respond to ghosting without compromising your dignity:
- “I’m really surprised by your silence after everything we’ve shared. If you’re no longer interested in continuing the relationship, I think I deserve to hear it from you directly.”
- “I didn’t expect to be ghosted after being in a committed relationship. If this is your way of ending things, I would have appreciated more respect.”
- “I’m confused and hurt by your disappearance, especially after how close we were. If something changed for you, I would rather have an honest conversation than this silence.”
- “I hope everything’s okay on your end. It’s been hard not hearing from you, and I’m not sure what’s going on. Can we talk about what happened?”
- “I’ve noticed you’ve completely stopped communicating, and that’s not how I expected our relationship to end. I deserve an explanation, and it’s disappointing not to get one.”
- “It’s clear you’ve decided to cut off contact, and while it hurts, I’ll respect your choice. I would have preferred a conversation, but I’ll move forward from here. Take care.”
- “Did you get abducted by aliens or something? Because I can’t think of another reason why someone in a relationship would just disappear like that.”
- “I thought our relationship meant more than just going silent when things get tough. I would have appreciated a conversation, but I’ll take this as your answer.”
- “I thought we were in a serious relationship, but ghosting isn’t how adults handle things. I deserve respect and communication, and I’m disappointed that’s not what I got.”
- “I’m really surprised by your silence, especially given how long we’ve been together. If this is your way of ending things, I’d appreciate the decency of a conversation.”
How to respond to soft ghosting
Soft ghosting, also known as caspering in a relationship, is when a person you’re talking to gradually and slowly starts cutting down conversation, eventually reaching a place where they might just like your messages, without responding to them. When you’re being soft ghosted, you might quickly see things go from texting each other every day to just seeing each other’s names when you’re scrolling through a list of who saw your story.
Noticing a ghoster lurking in the shadows of your virtual existence can be supremely annoying. If you’re not okay with their presence and want them to either resume contact or exit your life altogether, these examples of how to respond to soft ghosting might help:
- “Hey, noticed you’ve been a bit quiet. Everything okay?”
- “So, should I take the ‘like’ as a ‘let’s hang out’ or a ‘goodbye’?”
- “I’ve noticed our conversations have become less frequent. Are you still interested in keeping this going?”
- “I feel like I’m texting a magic 8-ball with all these likes! Any chance of an actual reply?”
- “If you’re not feeling the conversation anymore, it’s totally okay to let me know. I’d rather have clarity than just likes.”
- “I’ve noticed you’re not really engaging with the conversation. If you’re no longer interested, it’s cool—just let me know.”
- “I’ve enjoyed our conversations, but I’ve noticed you’ve been quieter lately. If you’re not as into this anymore, it’d be nice to know.”
- “I get the hint with all these likes! If this is your way of saying goodbye, no worries—take care!”
- “I’m not sure if you’re super busy or if our convo just fizzled out, but I’d love to hear from you if you’re still interested.”
- “You’ve been a little quiet lately, and I’m not sure where we stand. Should we still keep chatting or call it a day?”
How to respond to a ghoster who comes back
The thing about ghosters is that ever so often they come back. That too, when you have just about processed the distress they caused you and started moving on. If that happens, you need a high-value response to ghosting to give them a piece of your mind. For instance, the the number you are trying to reach text to give them a taste of their medicine without saying too much. Here are a few other ideas on how to respond to a ghoster who comes back:
- “Well, look who decided to return from the dead! What’s up, ghost?”
- “Hey! Surprised to hear from you after all this time. What happened?”
- “Hey, nice to hear from you. I was surprised when you disappeared. What changed?”
- “Hey, I wasn’t expecting to hear from you again. To be honest, disappearing without a word wasn’t cool, and I’m not sure how I feel about you coming back now.”
- “Oh, you’re back? Did your phone break for a few weeks, or…?”
- “It’s been a while since I heard from you. Honestly, I felt hurt when you disappeared without saying anything. What made you come back?”
- “I’m not sure what to make of you reappearing after ghosting me. I respect myself too much to accept that kind of behavior again.”
- “Hey! I moved on after not hearing from you. I hope everything is going well, but I’m not looking to reconnect.”
- “Did you get lost in the Bermuda Triangle or something? I’ve moved on, but I hope you’re doing well!”
- “Hey, I was surprised when you disappeared, and now that you’re back, I’d like to understand why. If we’re going to continue talking, let’s clear the air.”
FAQs
1. What to text after being ghosted?
If you are calling out someone who ghosted you then it’s best to send one last text and tell them that if they do not reply you will block them. Add image
2. How do you respond to a text after being ghosted?
Do not pour out your emotions and start begging them to come back. A smart way to deal with ghosting is to not reply to the ghoster’s texts or just leave cordial replies. Let them know they do not matter anymore and they would be left perplexed. The best ghosting response is to beat them at their own game.
3. How to respond to a ghoster who comes back?
If someone ghosted you once, there is no guarantee they wouldn’t do the same again. Do you want to go through that horrible emotional upheaval again? Certainly not. Then stay away.
4. What does ghosting say about a person?
It says that they are insecure, perhaps commitment-phobic people with low self-esteem who do not have the dignity to allow their partner closure before they walk away.
Final Thoughts
There are times when the person who ghosted comes back. Usually, it is because they’re lonely again and want to try their luck once more. Sometimes, they come back with a genuine circumstance that made them leave without notice. No matter what the reason is, once you have dealt with ghosting and recovered from the pain, all you have to do is listen to what they have to say and make a decision.
Do not become weak again, for people who ghost generally never have pure intentions. Be confident about yourself. The right person for you will never leave you this way, and you undeniably deserve better.
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