Workplace relationships can be complicated, and sometimes, it’s hard to tell whether your boss is just being friendly or if there’s something more beneath the surface. If you’ve ever asked yourself, “Does my boss have a crush on me?” or noticed subtle changes in their behavior, you’re not alone. Many professionals experience situations where a boss’s actions feel personal, even if they try to keep it under wraps. Understanding the signs your boss likes you but is hiding it can help you decide how to respond.
From preferential treatment to unusual texts, we bring you 30 work crush signs and provide practical advice on handling the situation in counsel with a California-based psychiatrist and cognitive behavior therapist, Dr. Shefali Batra (MD in psychiatry), who specializes in counseling for separation and divorce, breakup and dating, and premarital compatibility issues.
30 Signs Your Boss Likes You But Is Hiding It
Table of Contents
If you’ve noticed your boss’s behavior toward you is different from how they interact with others, you might be dealing with something beyond just workplace rapport. Small, subtle actions—like remembering personal details, making excuses to be near you, or prioritizing your work—could indicate an underlying attraction. Not sure how to tell if your boss likes you? Here are 30 signs your boss likes you but is hiding it.
1. They remember tiny details
Notice if your boss:
- Remembers tiny details like your coffee order, your favorite snacks, or that you had a pet turtle in third grade.
- Brings up past conversations as if they’ve been thinking about them long after they happened
- Surprise you with your favorite beverage on stressful days, showing a level of attentiveness beyond a professional relationship
If they recall minor personal anecdotes that you barely remember sharing and making conversations feel uniquely personal and special, it may be one of the signs of unspoken attraction at work.
2. They text you after work
These texts might start as something work-related but quickly turn into personal discussions, sometimes including:
- Jokes
- Memes
- Or even late-night “random thoughts.”
Dr. Batra shares, “Your boss might use a work pretext just to strike up a conversation, showing a persistent interest in keeping the connection going. Sometimes, they delete messages or say things like, “Oops, wrong person!” when it’s clear they meant to send it to you.” This is one of the work crush signs you should look out for.
Related Reading: My Wife Wants Open Marriage: 17 Tips To Navigate
3. Their feedback feels flirtatious
One of the indicators that your boss is secretly in love with you is if their feedback seems a bit too enthusiastic. It’s not just “Good job,” it’s “Great job, as always! 😉” or “I knew you’d handle this perfectly.” The extra enthusiasm suggests more than professional admiration, especially when compliments on your intelligence and work ethic come with a lingering smile. If they often add emojis or personalize their praise in a way they don’t with others, it’s one of the telltale signs of unspoken attraction at work.
4. They get jealous when you mention dating
This is a great tip on how to tell if your boss likes you. When you share anything about your love life with your boss, does any of the following happen?
- Their mood subtly shifts
- They become short with responses
- They suddenly lose interest in the conversation
- They ask unnecessary questions about your love life or change the topic completely, attempting to downplay their reaction
- They try to subtly discourage you from dating by emphasizing the downsides of relationships or jokingly saying, “I hope they treat you right.”
These behaviors reflect a sense of jealousy, which doesn’t make sense unless they are into you romantically.
Related Reading: I Hate My Girlfriend: Why You Feel This Way And What To Do
5. Your work BFF notices
Sometimes, people outside the situation can see the signs clearer than you. Dr. Batra shares, “If multiple coworkers make comments about your boss’s behavior, take note. They notice the extra attention, special treatment, and lingering glances your boss reserves just for you.” They might joke about it or even express concern if the behavior seems excessive.
Amanda, working as an associate in a company, shares, “I had a really good rapport with my manager and sometimes, we’d have casual conversation as well. But I thought he was just a friendly person. It wasn’t until two different coworkers pointed it out that I realized that my boss treats me differently than others.”
6. They laugh at all your jokes
While being supportive is great, excessive laughter—especially when no one else is laughing—could be a clue. They might even find a way to reference your jokes later, keeping inside humor alive to foster a deeper bond. They also go out of their way to create inside jokes, reinforcing a sense of exclusivity between the two of you.
7. Your projects get priority
If your assignments somehow always make it to the top of the pile, or you get special treatment with deadlines and flexibility, there could be something more at play. You may find that your ideas and proposals are met with enthusiastic approval while others face more scrutiny. Even when others have strong contributions, your boss finds ways to make yours shine.
Tyler, working in IT, shares, “My boss and I have a completely work-centric relationship and no interaction outside of it. But I can still tell my boss likes me because I can always get leeway with my deadlines. Not that I am complaining.”
8. They find reasons to touch you
These touches can take many forms:
- A reassuring pat on the back
- A brush of the hand during document exchanges
- “Accidentally” bumping into you
- Standing closer than necessary
Dr. Batra says “If these touches are occasional, happening once or twice, that could just be a coincidence (which you should still object to, if uncomfortable). But if they frequently make excuses to touch your shoulder or back, it could be a sign of hidden attraction.”
Related Reading: 21 Pisces Man Red Flags—Watch Out For These
9. You catch them staring at you in meetings
When you look up, they quickly glance away, pretending they were focused elsewhere. It happens repeatedly, and sometimes other people also notice the body language boss likes you. They may even fidget with their pen or adjust their posture when you enter the room. You might also find them unusually focused on your reactions during presentations. All these may be signs your boss wants to sleep with you.
10. Their compliments feel personal
Does your boss often give you quick compliments like “That color suits you so well” or “You always have the best style.”? These go beyond the usual work-related praise and show an appreciation for your personal appearance. They may even comment on small changes, like a new haircut or an accessory, indicating close observation. You might also notice they compliment you more than they do others.
Related Reading: What Leo Man Dislikes In A Woman And What He Likes
11. They offer “mentorship” just to you
While helping employees grow is part of leadership, if they seem overly invested in your success compared to others, it may be one of the signs your boss wants to sleep with you. They might initiate regular check-ins that extend beyond work matters. If they are personally ensuring your career progress while being indifferent to others, it’s worth noting.
Kathy, working as an intern at a tech firm, shares, “When I joined the company and received such detailed guidance from the manager, I was eager to learn more and grow. But soon, I realized that my boss treats me differently than others as they weren’t even getting half the attention that I was being given. Then the attention turned personal and made me so uncomfortable I had to switch jobs.”
12. They extend conversations unnecessarily
Even after the point has been made, they keep chatting, adding unnecessary details, or asking unrelated follow-up questions just to keep the conversation going. They might also pause and restart conversations to delay leaving your presence. When discussions are over, they seem reluctant to walk away.
Related Reading: How To Start Dating: Tips For Beginners & Those Starting Again
13. Your mistakes are overlooked
While your coworkers face scrutiny for small errors, your boss seems to let yours slide—or even defend you in situations where you may have been wrong. They may justify your errors to others or find ways to excuse them altogether. They might even step in to fix things for you, rather than holding you accountable.
14. Their tone changes when they talk to you
With others, they might be direct and professional, but with you, their voice softens, they use more humor, or they sound more engaged and interested. They may even unconsciously mirror your speaking style. You might notice a warmth in their tone that isn’t there with others.
15. They tease you like a high school crush
Playful teasing, joking at your expense, or using lighthearted sarcasm is often a sign of underlying attraction. They might also pretend to disagree with you just to keep the conversation going. If they frequently find ways to banter with you, it may be an indication they are secretly in love.
Wondering “Does my boss have a crush on me?”, this Reddit user shares a similar query, “he will just randomly pat my head or nudge me or just do things to make me happy or laugh or playfully be mean to me..”
16. They frequently ask about your weekend plans
While occasional curiosity is normal, if they frequently check in on your personal life, it could be a sign they want to be a part of it. They may subtly hint at places they’ll be going to see if you’ll be there too. If they consistently follow up on your plans, it’s a sign they’re genuinely interested in you. This can also be an indirect way of asking you out.
17. They always sit next to you in group settings
Out of all the available seats, they gravitate toward yours—whether it’s a meeting, a lunch gathering, or a work event. They might even casually reserve a spot for you, ensuring you’re always within reach. If seating is not assigned, they consistently find a way to be near you, as if by habit. If someone else takes the seat beside you, they may look disappointed or subtly try to reclaim the space next time.
18. They create inside jokes just for you
Shared humor and private references help form a bond, and if they make the effort to create these moments with you, it’s a sign of closeness. This exclusivity can be a telltale sign of hidden emotions. They may recall jokes from months ago or reference obscure details from past conversations, showing they actively remember and value your interactions. Sometimes, these jokes might be a subtle way of expressing their feelings for you without being obvious.
Related Reading: 25 Bedtime Stories For Girlfriend
19. They defend you in meetings (even when you’re wrong)
While support is great, if they constantly take your side—even when it’s unwarranted—it may indicate deeper feelings. They might jump to your defense in front of colleagues or higher-ups without hesitation, downplaying your mistakes or finding ways to redirect blame. This behavior may extend beyond work-related matters, as they may also support you in social conversations or office politics.
20. You get more one-on-one meetings than necessary
Meetings that could easily be emails suddenly require face-to-face time, especially in a more casual setting. They may linger after meetings or suggest coffee discussions instead of emails. If you compare your schedule with colleagues, you might notice that you get significantly more personal attention. They might also extend meetings under the pretense of discussing work but gradually steer the conversation toward more personal conversation topics.
21. They dress better when you’re around
You notice a shift in their wardrobe:
- Sharper suits
- Styled hair
- Extra effort in their appearance
If they used to dress casually but suddenly upgrade their style, it could be a sign they want to impress you. Pay attention to whether their outfits complement yours, as mirroring clothing choices is a common subconscious attraction sign.
Related Reading: 17 Signs A Woman Has Not Made Love For A Long Time
22. Their texts are full of emojis
Flirty emojis like excessive winks, smirks, or hearts in messages suggest an attempt to be playful or flirty beyond normal professional communication. Even when discussing mundane work topics, they manage to slip in a playful emoji or light-hearted comment. Dr. Batra says, “If their texting style with you is more animated than with others, it could be their way of subtly conveying interest while maintaining plausible deniability.”
23. They “accidentally” run into you outside wWork
Bumping into them at your favorite café or near your home could be a coincidence—but if it happens frequently, it may not be. They may casually ask about your usual spots or plans and then suddenly appear there. These “random” encounters often involve a suggestion to grab coffee or chat for a while, reinforcing their desire to spend more time with you outside of work.
24. They offer to drive you home
Whether it’s raining, late, or just out of the blue, their eagerness to be alone with you signals potential hidden feelings. They may use excuses like “I was heading that way anyway” to make the offer seem natural. If they go out of their way to adjust their route or stay longer just to ensure you get home safely, it could be a sign they genuinely care about you beyond professional responsibilities.
25. They get nervous around you
Getting nervous is a classic sign of attraction. It could look like:
- Fidgeting
- Avoid eye contact
- Stumbling over their words when you’re near
If they’re normally confident but seem flustered in your presence, it’s a clear indicator of their emotions. They may also overthink their responses, taking longer than necessary to reply to your emails or messages to ensure they say the right thing.
26. They seek your opinion on personal matters
Beyond work topics, they value your perspective on life, relationships, and personal dilemmas, seeking more emotional connection. They may ask questions about your upbringing, your dreams, or your thoughts on relationships in a way that suggests more than mere curiosity. If they confide in you about their own personal struggles, it signals a deeper level of trust and intimacy.
27. They make excuses to be in your workspace
Whether they need to “check on something” or “borrow” an item, they seem to find reasons to be near you more often than necessary. If they frequently pass by your desk or linger longer than necessary during work conversations, it’s a sign they enjoy your presence. Even if they pretend to be there for work, their body language can show signs your boss likes you but is hiding it.
Related Reading: Looking For Words To Make Her Trust You? 300 Ideas
28. Other coworkers have noticed
If multiple people bring up how your boss acts around you, it’s probably not just your imagination. Your coworkers may tease you or point out subtle behaviors you hadn’t noticed yourself. If they tell you things like, “It’s so obvious” or “They treat you differently,” it’s a strong indicator that their feelings are apparent to those observing from the outside.
29. They try to cheer you up when you’re stressed
A boss who goes out of their way to make you laugh with jokes or positive distractions might be more emotionally invested than expected. They may show concern about your workload, encourage you to take breaks, or find ways to lift your mood. This level of attentiveness, especially if they don’t do it for everyone, is a telltale sign of hidden attraction.
30. They never seem to date anyone seriously
Despite being eligible and seemingly interested in relationships, they always seem to be “single” or “just not ready to settle down.” They might make comments about how difficult it is to find the right person or how demanding their work schedule is. If they subtly downplay their interest in others while maintaining a strong interest in you, it’s a major hint that they’re waiting for the right opportunity.
How To Respond If Your Boss Likes You
Realizing your boss may have feelings for you can create an awkward workplace environment. Whether you share those feelings or not, it’s essential to handle the situation with professionalism and clarity. How you respond depends on your level of comfort and whether the attraction is mutual. Setting boundaries and maintaining professionalism will ensure that your work environment remains respectful and free from unnecessary tension. Here’s how you can respond in different scenarios.
If you don’t like them back
Not feeling the same way? It’s important to establish firm yet professional boundaries while ensuring that your work environment remains comfortable and productive. Navigating such situations can be tricky, as you want to maintain respect and professionalism without creating unnecessary workplace tension. Whether your boss’s actions are subtle or overt, handling the situation with clear communication and confidence is key.
- Maintain professional boundaries
- Keep interactions strictly work-related
- If messages get too personal, steer them back to work topics
- Politely but firmly reject any invitations outside of work
- If discomfort persists, document interactions and consider HR intervention
Related Reading: I Don’t Trust My Boyfriend – 9 Probable Reasons And 6 Helpful Tips
If you do like them back
If you find yourself reciprocating the feelings, tread carefully. Love in the workplace comes with challenges, and you’ll need to handle them responsibly. While romantic connections can develop in any setting, the workplace adds layers of complexity due to professional expectations, potential conflicts of interest, and company policies. It’s crucial to assess whether these feelings are genuine or simply a result of frequent interactions in a confined environment. Additionally, consider the impact on your reputation, career trajectory, and work-life balance before making any decisions.
- Understand the risks—workplace relationships can be tricky
- Be aware of company policies on dating
- Keep things professional in the office to avoid gossip
- Have an open conversation about expectations
- Consider whether this could impact your career
If they won’t back off
When your boss doesn’t respect boundaries, it can create an uncomfortable or even hostile work environment that affects your ability to perform and feel safe in your role. The imbalanced power dynamics can make it challenging to set firm boundaries, and if left unaddressed, it can escalate into a stressful and toxic situation. It’s crucial to take action as soon as possible, ensuring that your professional integrity and well-being remain intact.
- Set clear boundaries in conversations
- Avoid unnecessary one-on-one meetings
- Keep records of uncomfortable interactions
- If needed, escalate concerns to HR
- Take legal action if you still feel unsafe
If either one or both of you are in a relationship/married
If you or your boss are already in a committed relationship, things become even more complicated, as the stakes are much higher and the ethical implications cannot be ignored. Navigating this situation requires an extra level of caution to ensure that professional integrity and personal relationships are both protected. Emotional entanglements at work can lead to unnecessary stress, office gossip, and potential reputational damage if not handled properly.
- Recognize the ethical and professional complications
- Avoid encouraging or engaging in any flirtation
- Redirect interactions toward work topics only
- Distance yourself if necessary
- If it becomes problematic, discuss it with HR
Key Pointers
- Workplace crushes are common but should be handled professionally
- If you feel uncomfortable, set clear boundaries and escalate if needed
- If mutual, ensure discretion and be mindful of potential consequences
- Prioritize your career and workplace reputation over fleeting emotions
Final Thoughts
Deciphering workplace signals can be challenging, especially when power dynamics are involved. If you notice the signs your boss likes you but is hiding it, take a step back to assess what you want and how to handle it. Professionalism should always come first, ensuring that your work environment remains comfortable, respectful, and free of unnecessary drama.
Your contribution does not constitute a charitable donation. It will allow Bonobology to continue bringing you new and up-to-date information in our pursuit of helping anyone in the world to learn how to do anything.
Featured
How To Tell If Your Boss Likes You Romantically?
15 Signs Your Male Coworker Likes You
Why Do Relationships Become Toxic? 10 Reasons
13 Respectful Ways To Ask A Coworker For A Date
Dealing With A Crush At Work – How To Handle A Crush On A Coworker
Consensual Love In The Workplace: You Could Be Disregarding Consent Without Even Knowing It
The 10 Do’s And Don’ts Of Dating A Co-Worker
What To Do When A Woman Is Flirting With Your Husband At Work
Female Body Language At The Workplace- A Do’s And Dont’s Guide
An Office Romance Gone Bad – Tina And Varun’s Story
Dating A Younger Man At Work—A Workplace Affair With An Intern
We Make Out In The Office Regularly And Everyone Knows About It
12 Ways Office Affairs Can Spell Trouble For You
Dating A Coworker? Here’s How To Handle Office Romance
Woh office ke affair: When temptation surrounds you at work
15 Signs A Female Coworker Likes You
13 Signs Your Work Wife Is Taking Over Your Life
How Do I Make My Coworker Stop Flirting With Me? — A True Story