When A Good Marriage Is About Supporting Your Partner

When it comes to supporting your partner in times of need, no one knows what to do and what not to better than I do. I have a very short temper, and although I try my best to overcome my situational anger issues, when it comes to the outside world, I always expect my spouse to support me.

We ran out of milk and sugar at home, and there was nothing we could cook without these staples. My spouse and I embarked on a daring drive on the crowded roads with our eyes peeled for shops where one could make an emergency purchase of these essentials.

We argued as he refused to stop in the middle of the main road because I had spotted some supermarkets. I argued as he followed the bus taking a slow left turn and as we were mid-turn, the light changed. The traffic cop gleefully waved us down, standing bravely in the middle of the road, right in the path of a car being driven by one half of an arguing couple.

We had presented to him the right earning opportunity. My husband reluctantly stopped the car.

The Importance Of Supporting Your Spouse

“You jumped the signal,” the traffic cop announced, looking like the cat who had swallowed a canary. Or rather, was about to. I rushed to my husband’s defense before he could answer. “It was green,” I said rather hotly. “It was green when we started to turn and what can we do if the bus in front of us was too slow?”

The cop, in his typical male chauvinist style, looked at my husband and asked him to park the car and walk to his bike parked a short distance away.

I stepped out of the car as well and followed them, not willing to miss out on an opportunity to argue since I was much annoyed already at my husband and his principle of not stopping in the middle of the road. Like it did any good to us.

I heard the cop asking for a fine. Well, I was not fine with that. We had done no wrong. I continued to argue. “We will not pay. Let us go to the police station. I will complain that you are falsely charging us.”

I was supporting my partner today, and nothing could stop me. I always tell my husband that emotional support in a relationship is the key to a long married life. But the situation kept getting more frivolous the longer it went on.

Supporting your partner unconditionally

Much to my annoyance, the cop told me politely, “Ma’am, please sit in the car. Let the menfolk settle this matter.” And to top it all, the husband gave me that look and motioned to me to go back to the car. I was mortified. Here I was being a supportive partner, and he didn’t want me to back him up.

I let the men settle but not before sending a curse his way that the money would never be of use to him.

Usually, when it comes to street fights and arguments, my spouse and I suddenly have one of the most supportive relationships you will ever see, and that goes unsaid. I don’t need a cue to jump headlong into the argument.

I employ my better verbal skills and he, when required, employs his muscle; the said employment of which is made possible by a subtle rolling up of sleeves and casual flexing; the muscles, I warn you, are like the elephant’s tooth – only for looks and not for chomping on fodder.

You’re parked in the wrong place!

When I encounter a situation where a car is parked right behind my parking gate, I fly into a rage of such massive proportions that it would be sufficient to propel me to my destination. Him, on the other hand, he is polite and pedantic in his approach.

He is truly interested in making an intelligent human being out of the poor sod who has parked behind my gate. And I am ready to poke the offender’s car tires, much like the proverbial cutting of the facial appendage to spite the said face.

I would rather walk than let him drive his car away to free my gate, I often claim as I brandish my carpet needle. My husband, in his wisdom, stays back and waits for his cue, because he wants to make an effort at being a supportive partner.

When I have exhausted my verbal abilities (abuses), and am in grave danger of being pummelled by the said sod, I call for my spouse who waits in the wings and appears almost instantly, like Spiderman who has already changed into his costume in anticipation of a situation.

Related Reading:  When my reluctant husband became my biggest supporter

Supportive relationships are about mutual respect

The advantage and disadvantage of being a woman is witnessing the inherent male chauvinism; a situation therefore can swing either way. Some type of people lecture the said woman to be seen and not heard and therefore declare them not worthy of a fight and slink away.

The other type behaves like a tiger in front of the said woman, and in contrast, like a purring kitten in front of the man of the house. Either way, it is a win-win situation for us, because together we have the might of the pen and the sword, rather words and muscle, hence we are good there.

Supporting your partner in any fights or quarrels, even if it is just a petty street fight, is very important. Emotional support in a relationship is the key to a long-lasting bond that will keep you attached to each other.

FAQs

How Do You Set Emotional Boundaries in Relationships?

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